Recently, I've become more aware of the void at the 'background' of consciousness. It became apparent after the suggestion you posted on your blog where you stated the 'I Am' is in foreground. By focusing at the foreground I noticed that the sense of 'I Am' is like a threshold or borderline between the unfolding manifest consciousness at the front and the unmanifest Void at the back. It is strange because in a sense I have always been aware of the Void, but never as an object. The consciousness feels like a tiny droplet in comparison to the vastness of the Void. Come to think of it, when I described consciousness as feeling like a small room this was probably because I was becoming aware of the Void, but now I can really feel it expanding, or at least coming into better focus as an object 'outside' of manifest consciousness. I see that the subject is beyond this too since it witnesses the Void.
When people are sad about the death of their loved one, it is not the body they are upset about letting go of, but the consciousness that functioned through it. Death and suffering is difficult especially in the moment, but I now see it's place in manifestation. It is just apart of it, it does not happen to anyone. However, despite understanding this Sir my desire to help any sentient thing has grown tremendously. I feel if I were anything it is this consciousness, not the individual I was conditioned to be, and as such, why not help out when I can? Helping is really only helping yourself. I now see clearly why you have devoted your life to helping animals and people learn the truth, it is truly the most fulfilling way to function in the body.
Several moments of Oneness have struck me and bliss overflows from the Heart. These moments are truly special. Also, often I have felt the desire to ask you a question, but the answer comes immediately in a thought or unfolds in some way where the question is answered. Some strange coincidences have been happening lately too, which leads me to think the more you work with consciousness as consciousness the more it takes care of itself, there is no need to worry about doing anything or making something happen, all manifests of it's own accord.
I know most of this is conceptual and still on the level of the mind, but this is what has been happening the past couple weeks for me.
I cannot thank you enough Sir for your guidance. Although, I feel I have much further to go, I feel I have come so far so quickly and it is all because of You. I am eternally grateful.
You are doing well. You conceptual understanding is solid and is based in experience. Keep going as you are doing. Later you will find no need to use terms like foreground, background, manifest or unmanifest. The strangest experiences will come and go and you will be unconcerned and happy.
Your closest companion will always be emptiness, but know that is still not the core of you or all of you.