01 January 2010

I would like to ask You something about the inexpressable truth.
Everything you say and the illusion of you even speaking to me is just
coming from pure awareness itself. Absolutely nothing has any inherent existence.

All those stories on your site must be pure fantasy, and have no truth. All is created
by Self that is trying to get me to sway a certain way to make her (it, whatever) wake up.

I realize you can't really explain anything to me, you can only destroy my mind and dogmatic thought patterns because you don't exist. Everything we are talking about is a lie.

Everything is coming off as unreal to me, and absolutely done with searching for guides outside my Self. I keep having these dreams that transition perfectly into the waking state..

You and I are similar in the sense that our Selves kind of "set us up" to be awakened whether
we wanted to or not.

My only question is, does awakening have to be painful? The emotion is overwhelming!





I experienced no pain. What is your experience and can you locate who or what is experiencing pain? If there is a perception of pain, but NO ONE to whom it is happening, it is just an occasion in consciousness. It seems that you are saying there is still a person experiencing negative emotions or negative physical sensations.


  1. Hi T,
    I am not too sure if I am understanding this properly or we are talking the same thing yet I feel inspired to give my perspective.

    When the feeling first "dawned" on me that everything is unreal ,it hit me bad.I mentioned in my mails to Edji few of them are also stated here, about the depressions and the sadness which englufed me.So in that sense I can relate to you.The more I witnessed it the more emotions arose.It completely shattered me and tore me to pieces.
    But then something happened ,the Guru shakti in me (I believe Edjis inner voice to me) told me that if all this is unreal why even Witness them.Leave them completely alone and instead settle at the background and BE THAT.
    Miraculously all emotions/pain/depression died out by sheer ignorance to them.
    Even now bit of emotions do come,thoughts do come and everything takes place but somehow for me there is a big shift in perspective.The background ME has become more and more prominent and many times there is no witnessing happening too. I may choose to witness them or may not because it does not matter and in that sense the witnesser itself is missing.
    The background ME is where the attention moves and a feeling comes that nothing apart from that matters anymore.There exist this wonderful sense of happiness, peace and inner fulfillment.
    I am not sure if words can communicate the correct feelings and message.Hope it helps.


  2. Someone asked, "Does awakening have to be painful?"

    My two cents, for what it's worth (absolutely nothing!): The process leading up to awakening can be extremely painful for some people -- though not for others. Letting go of the ego -- all the garbage you've been accumulating for eons -- that defines, yet circumscribes yourself . . . isn't always a pleasant experience. The end result, however, is complete freedom from all suffering. After awakening -- and I mean true awakening, not just some pseudo-happy experience at a weekend Enlightenment $eminar -- the body and mind still function in a manner of speaking, but they are no longer relevant. The old analogy of burnt rope is appropriate. Thoughts may still stir within the mind, and impulses of pain may even flow through the body, but they are of no consequence.

    My body sometimes experiences acute pain, to the extent that it can barely function. At those times, when it's necessary for some reason to get something done (like there's anything to do), I take prescription painkillers so the body will work again and do what it needs to. Otherwise, it just really doesn't matter. Whether I cavort around like an idiot or lay in a heap in the corner doesn't really make any difference in the greater scheme of things. The body-mind is just the apparatus through which I experience a dream world that flickers, fades and burns in the light of a billion suns. It burns, burns, burns . . . nothing but ashes everywhere.

    Love and Blessings,
    David H.