I teach about the joy of Self, the explosion of the
energetic, charismatic, powerful, self-illumined, ecstatic Self as it bursts
within me and pours out in ecstatic expression.
I sing the song of Self. Sentience everywhere is that same Self and can realize that Selfhood by turning within, looking deeper and deeper into ones inner awareness, discovering emptiness and thelight that permeates that emptiness: The Clear lighted Void!
I sing the song of Self. Sentience everywhere is that same Self and can realize that Selfhood by turning within, looking deeper and deeper into ones inner awareness, discovering emptiness and thelight that permeates that emptiness: The Clear lighted Void!
Then, subsequently or simultaneously, turning within we FEEL
for Self, our heart of hearts, the river of joy and bliss from which all
emotions and energies arise and disappear.
Each period of inwardness is cyclic: something arises from within—a remembered trauma, sadness, depression, anger with no context. It gets stronger and stronger and we shrink from it out of habit. But if we reverse that habit, invite the feeling to come closer an inch at a time, until we kiss and that energy comes into our hearts, and we accept and embrace it, then love the anger, depression, sadness, loneliness, and comes a new sense of completion and wholeness. Something once lost, repressed, denied, is once again in us, part of us, in a bigger, more complete and powerful, grounded sense of Self. And with this, such a sense of gratitude and grace, acceptance and humility. God and I are one. You and I are one.
Each period of inwardness is cyclic: something arises from within—a remembered trauma, sadness, depression, anger with no context. It gets stronger and stronger and we shrink from it out of habit. But if we reverse that habit, invite the feeling to come closer an inch at a time, until we kiss and that energy comes into our hearts, and we accept and embrace it, then love the anger, depression, sadness, loneliness, and comes a new sense of completion and wholeness. Something once lost, repressed, denied, is once again in us, part of us, in a bigger, more complete and powerful, grounded sense of Self. And with this, such a sense of gratitude and grace, acceptance and humility. God and I are one. You and I are one.
I can say now, without a doubt, that the simple steps that Edji describes above really do work. I am beginning to
ReplyDeleteknow the Self just as he reports. I've been his student for a year. For the first six months, I experienced wild
energy swings, shaking, ecstasies, depressions, paranoia, grief, joy, playfulness ....all washing through me along
with unconscious memories suddenly arising and new perspective on conscious memories and habit patterns.
I often felt overwhelmed and lost, getting stuck in obsessively running tape loops. Sometimes, I wrote Edji many
emails all night and day, just to have a connection and reminder that it was really ok to keep sinking into this stuff
Edji was supportive, and unrelenting in his teaching words. No matter how many symptoms appeared in me, the
medicine was always very simple, clear and direct: get out of my thinking loops, ignore them, turn away ; and focus
on the I AM sensation, just stay there unless a feeling state became overwhelming; then turn into and welcome the
emotions and physical effects; let them take me down to their bottom and stay there, until a shift happens on its own
Because I trusted Edji, I followed these directions over and over for months.
I still do, though in the last six months, the energy surges slowly have calmed down, as I got better at just accepting
Whatever comes. I have started seeing my chakras and various lighted spaces within. I have more fun now
exploring the many rooms within. I'm now having heat up in my Body and all kinds of shifts in my Subtle Body.
Lots of new territory and still welcoming depression, fear and grief. I'm feeling less needy, more centered.
I'm less attached to thinking, of all kinds, because inner silence is much more compelling and enjoyable.
My greatest joy is my increasing sense of Self, just my own true Reality. For me, any emotional state or thinking
loop, pales in the face of pure Sentience. I feel constantly blessed, both for this real change in me, and for
having Edji's fearless example. I knew that no matter what happened to me, in me, it would never knock him over.
I love Edji with all my being for accepting me, welcoming me as his student and as a part of his life.
I have been truly blessed.
Syndria
Beautiful, Syndria. Thanks!
DeleteMatthew
You asked, and I want to be with you all. So, here is my view -conclusion de-jour. I am not a teacher per se. I see we are all teachers and all students. I was part of your awakening - is it not so? This is what one wakes up to. I am consciousness, this consciousness creates the universe, the universe emanates this consciousness. I see you in the universe, you emanate consciousness that is me. It is one continuous and reciprocal creation. But so what? It has always been so. Ok, now I see it but what are we going to do now Edji? Besides smile more and feel gratitude all the time.
ReplyDeleteYours,
Andrew
Better words might be I am awareness, conscious and unconscious. There is an enormous amount of what I am that is completely beyond cognition or conscious experience. Maybe I shouldn't have started typing in the first place.
ReplyDeleteThe question remains though, in this small experience here, what to do now?
Andrew