27 November 2014

Syndria is Truly Getting the Point of the spiritual Search: Self-Realization:


Satsang felt so deep tonight, a stillness as you talked.

At least from my experience, the energy was strong and centered in my heart and especially strong in my belly.

The group felt that way too, no chatting, nothing extraneous.

I sank inward into presence rather than up into ecstasy.

Instead of swirling dancing energy moving in fast colorful swaths, it was solid expansive energy radiating outward from my core.

Your teaching feels so fine honed and focused now.
I see a few new people coming to Satsang and many new names commenting on your posts.

You may never have lots of students like Chetanananda does,  but you can take a few students very, very deep into Life ... Love ... Wisdom ... Truth ... Self.

You have a particular skill for going deep.    For communicating  to your students how to do that.

Your descriptions of the inner landscape are so uniquely specific and nuanced.

You take me on an inner journey of ever deepening sensitivity and awakening every time you teach about the wealth of depths and perspectives and spaces and energies within us.

I feel like an astronaut of inner space.

I've never loved spiritual practice the way I do now.   I've never thirsted so deeply to find my Self.

And I've never felt so alive, so human, so loving.

During the last few days my sense of I Am has become so pervasive, so rich, so still that love seems to just be me.

I feel like a beacon at times....a lighthouse of love...

Of course, then I also slide into the volcano inside where I burn  and cook and scream and curse.

And I'm starting to love that too.

For some reason, I feel like you have a Sangha waiting in Az.     Satsang with live people instead of all virtual.

I'm starting to feel good about going back there, in a new way.    I'd love to chant and dance with other people, create a group energy that attracts others to it.

Have a group generating love in the desert....  Let's do it.

I just have to have this time of inner working here alone for awhile longer.  I'm too dysfunctional to move right now and too inward looking to pull out of it into packing mode.

But I can start disposing of books and stuff no longer serving my life now.    That might feel good to do as the cold and snow is now appearing.    I feel hibernation coming on ...a good time to pair things down to basics.

There is both rain snow and ice whipping against my  windows tonight, always happens day before Thanksgiving.   Year after year the same ....

Sometimes I wonder if its the spirits of the Native Peoples stirring up rough weather just to make Thanksgiving a bit tougher to take for granted.

Making us white folk work harder for our holiday.

I played Native American singing and drumming tonight just to say I'm thinking of The Great Spirit tonight.

My apartment feels filled up with spirits ... they don't like ice and snow either.     Ha !

Goodnight Edji.   I love you/me.  

Rock   Head

 (Syndria's reference to "Rock Head" refers to my teaching, and that of her previous mentor, Seung Sahn, that you have to become completely stupid in order to find your Self.  Give up all knowledge, all understanding, all concepts, all words, and just look and FEEL within for that spark of sentience that can be called 'I Am', 'I-Exist', "I see/feel and experience myself as light, energy, bliss and knowledge."

You can all come to Online Satsangs at 2 pm California time, every Sunday.  Go to http://satsangwithedji.weebly.com.  Enter the room with the password   edji   used on two different screens.  Then go to the "Start Broadcasting" button in order to ennable your own microphone and video feed.  ALL ARE WELCOME!

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