16 November 2014

Loneliness is Primarily Loneliness for Self, for Knowing and Loving and Being Loved by one’s Own Self.

    Strangely though the Self is difficult to find because we are not used to focusing on our Self. We don’t look within, watch and explore. We don’t sit still to feel our own heart beat. We don’t listen to the sounds in our head that are always there. We don’t look into the inner darkness that shrouds ever-flowing internal energies from being seen.

      We do not feel into our heart area to feel the small electric impulses that mark the beginning of feeling of the I Am sensation.
We don’t look into our gut from the inside, or feel from the inside to find the root cauldron of Hara energies. We do not perceive ourselves as a spiritual presence within and without the body, a sort of ghost within the physical mechanism of the body.
     We do not playfully explore our emotions, all of them, with an attitude of excited exploration. Indeed, many run from emotions in fear of anticipated pain. Many run from relationships from fear of being suffocated, or of experience heartbreaking loss and grief. So very, very few really experience the full spectrum of emotion, and as such, have no access to the experience of Subtle Body energies.

     Few have sat still long enough and looked within attentively so that the darkness within melts and gives way to a vast self-illumined Emptiness, the Void, which contains everything, all phenomena.

     So few have gone deeper yet and experienced the bliss of the foundational state known as Turiya, wherein originates the feeling of I Am. Ramana and Nisargadatta both referred to this as realization of the Godhead, the Atman, which deeper experience reveals as identical to God him or herself, and with it the recognition that one’s own Self is complex and deep yet unified: You are God; you are Senience, the ability to sense yourself and the world; you are Knowing of who and what you are; you are bliss; you are Emptiness; you are the energies that flow through your body and also through your Subtle Body, AKA as your sense of Presence.

     All these things you are, far greater than anything you can imagine until you spend years of internal watching with the same intensity as you explore the external world looking for answers to internal questions and for completion and happiness.

     The search for another, a companion, is really usually a search for one’s own self, the illumined soul, in another.

     Some rare beings do find their own soul in another, a lover, a guru, God, a mountain, and gain Self-Realization in that way. We see in the other that which we do not see or feel within ourselves.

     In some we feel they move with the gravity of a planet and are able to plumb the depths of existence by their merest touch. Others are firebrands, whose touch excites the Life Force in us long dormant from boredom with the external world.

     In some we find a deep quiet, an access to the Void and the light of the Void. We “feel” that in their presence and we stay to acquire it. In their presence, it is easier to experience it in ourselves.

    It is because of this understanding I can say that loneliness, or even desperation for companionship, the other, is actually a hidden desperation of finding and knowing our own Self totally, from top to bottom.

     A guru or a lover can certainly help you find your Self, and makes the search so much easier for the beginner unused to inner exploration. But ultimately you need to realize that the want of another is really a want for one’s own complete Self-Experience, Self-Knowing, Self-Realization.          --------------------------------------

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    1. Clearly in the last three posts Ed is so christian like never before, but you failed to see this. (this is my opinion).
      "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." - do you? I don't need your prayers if you look down on me as a lost sheep. Lucifer, if you like, is very cunning, he tells - all others are lost BUT you. Therefore this 'you' is exalted through the backdoor.

      "So I say to you, Ask and it will be given to you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you." - did it open for you? (20 years - something must have happened, i want to hear it)

      "If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you." <-- Ed constantly stresses on this - be open, don't be afraid of your insides, etc.

      "Little children, you are from God, and have conquered them; for the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in this world." <-- here Jesus says , in short, - search within for the One, God, Self , how you like it - name it.

      This is my interpretation.

  2. Dennis, I have no idea of which Dennis you are, but this is your opinion. In 20 years of Advaita, did you find yourself? The Self of All within as your own direct experience? If so, then you can reject what I say as false opinion.

    But what is your direct experience of Jesus or God, or is it only your opinion and belief unsupported by direct experience?

    I say the same God who dwelled in Christ also dwells in your own Self; it needs only to be found. Thus the I Am, the Self, Christ is the way to God realization. God realization and Self-Realization are one.

  3. Thanks. great post. Right on target. Why do I keep forgetting this?


  4. Thank you for this post Edji. I remember being a child lying in bed and a slight warm summer breeze coming in the window and feeling terribly lonely at the same time. I thought that maybe if I was at the County Fair, 2 blocks away, I would feel better....being around all those people But I felt that the loneliness was something much deeper, too deep to be taken away by other people, even too deep for my mom and dad to take away. Then at times I would go way way deep into darkness thinking something in that darkness would help(strange for a kid to be doing). But in that darkness was a void and so deep that I would be scared and have to come back. Little did I know then that it was the Self I was looking for and desired to be deeply loved by that Self.
    I can feel that love from the Self at times and it is the only Love that satisfies completely.steve

    1. Steve, very nice. I have had the same feelings and you captured it very articulately in your personal story.

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    1. "So this was my last comment."
      now i go away.. bye bye...
      helloo.... someone say bye to me.
      for real.
      fuck i am bad and mad.

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