EMAIL TO ME REGARDING THE ABSOLUTE BEING BEYOND BEINGNESS OR PRESENCE.

Hello Ed. Such a delight to stumble across your understanding of Nisargadatta Maharaj. I have found no one else who seems to understand the distinction between Beingness/Presence and the Absolute, which he discussed incessantly. 

Experience and nuance of dwelling as That which is beyond Consciousness, STRIPPED of Beingness is the focus. 

There is a kind of twilight where one is the non-being/Absolute, but turns back to 'face' the thinned out 'edge' of consciousness; which is so extra-ordinary because there is experience possible there. Experience of void and experience of consciousness in all its facets. Do you know of this? I had not expected to find another who did.

Very kind regards,

Tom

Yes I do Tom.

One day I awoke and found out that nothing changed going from sleep to awakeness. I was the same in each.  I did not change or was affected in any way. Therefore I was independent of changes in states of Consciousness.

Then I saw all these aspects of Consciousness, like waking, dreaming and sleep as well as everything that happened in Consciousness, came to me and covered me like a cloud, but they did not touch me.  I was entirely outside of Consciousness.  But I, as This, had no form, and probably was only self aware because I was experiencing myself as apart from Consciousness, for when I looked for the witness, there was  nothing there.

In my pure state there was no knowing, only the potential for it. I had existence beyond knowing.

SATSANG TODAY, SUNDAY JUNE 29, 1 PM CALIFORNIA TIME

ON THE INTERNET, GO TO:

http://satsangwithedji.weebly.com

Sign in with the password   "edji"  two separate times.

Then go to  "Broadcast" and sign in.

Please pause your microphone.

All Jnanis Appear to Agree: the Goal, whichever you select, is found through self-inquiry or love and surrender

If you aim to find/experience the Absolute, the supposed source of the subject-witness, you miss the Self-Realization of the totality of your various bodies and talents with God. You get only peace.

With the other, Self-Realization within existence, you feel real, total, solid, yet vulnerable.

And, how do you find the source?

The source is not the space between thoughts, the gap or beingness, or space, or emptiness, for that space is infinite and it is also a phenomenon. You experience the space, the emptiness. You "see" it with your inner eye, and feel it as your extended sense of presence.

So the question becomes, how do I find the Absolute outside of anything that can be seen or felt?  That is, where do you look or seek?

If you think just keeping silent will take you to the source, you are likely mistaken.  Since the inner space, the "gap," emptiness is infinite, you are much more likely just to become lost in this space, feel a modicum of peace, but miss finding the source which cannot be found.

You have to become it, become the source, which is entirely different from seeking it or by being silent and doing nothing.

All Jnanis appear to agree there are two ways: self inquiry by finding and abiding in the I Am, by locating the I Am sensation, abiding there, accepting it and loving it, or through Bhakta, love and surrender.  But surrender to who or what?  It does not matter as long as your love grows, flowers and flows.

BLOG READERSHIP DRAMATICALLY DECLINING ALONG WITH DONATIONS

I have no idea why it is, but this blog's readership is declining dramatically during the past few months, and the entire past year shows a huge decline over the same period two and three years ago.

The same holds true for Facebook.  There appear to be far fewer readers.

Lastly, there has been a huge decrease in donations, so much so I had to decrease my support of other cat colony managers and my spay/neuter/return program.

I find this strange as my last six months of posts seem to me to be deeper, more penetrating, and more immediately useful than they were four years ago, with much more personal, down-to-earth articles on our very human problems explored both from a "transcendental" POV, but also the POV of an embodied human, with frustrations, needs, anxiety, and other stresses related to being in a human body.

The only bright spot is online Satsang where attendence holds steady at about 30-35 attendees per week.

I find all this amazing as I see no other teachers on FB or the web that address both the transcendental awakenings, the Satoris and other kinds of Self-Realization experiences, the methods, from self-inquiry to love, and also the joys and problems of ordinary human consciousness as are explored in these teachings.

It seems that in order to keep up my animal rescue efforts that I might need to back out of spiritual teaching and go back to editing medical reports as a more reliable income source.

You tell me, my audience, what is going on and how what do you think of my teaching style for the last two years?

Below are the blog readership charts for the last 4 years.

Click on this chart.  This shows readership for the past 12 months.  May and June has slipped under 200 per day.  There was one big spike in November when this blog was mentioned on some mega-site.

This is 2011-2012.  Notice readership was mostly in the 300 range and rarely feel below 200, with spikes to 400--600.

This is four years ago.  Readership was between 300-500, with spikes to 800.

There have been almost 1,100 posts during these four years, or about five a week.

What is happening?  I think teachings have increased in value, but readership and substantially decreased donations indicate otherwise.

New Focus on Self-Exploration During Satsang

Our New Focus on Self-Exploration During Satsang

For the last month, rather than too much talk about methods of self-realization, like the myriad of ways one can practice self-inquiry, or talk about the nature of the "real" or abstractly, about Self or Beingness, I have been emphasizing direct experiencing of YOUR inner world through guided meditation and facilitating the sharing of blissful energies throughout the Sangha during Satsang.

Therefore more and more people have been experiencing the involutional energies that try to coax your awareness deeper than the mind into the ocean of just beingness below it, down to the Causal Body level of Conscious Sleeping, going into the state of Forgetfulness consciously, which is the door to the Witness, the Absolute, Parabrahman.

This is where my teacher Robert, Robert Adams directly us when he was alive: a place of complete rest and peace.

Why?

Although now I direct people to to a different area of Robert's teachings about using Love discover a different aspect of the Infinite within themselves, namely the Self, Turiya, the Love/Bliss Body through love because I feel this is the way of our time for the West, not Advaita, this way can be quite arduous and sometimes scary and painful.  Therefore, it does help to have an escape, an escape into taking the position of the Witness.

Recently I have been taking Satsangees downwards towards the Causal Body and hopefully deeper into the Witness so that they know first-hand the kind of awakening that Robert and Nisargadatta talk about.  After knowing this Parabrahman state well, one can "come back" into Consciousness by loving others and finding the Self that dwells in your heart and body, and loving It. Then when your love is strong enough, that Self of Consciousness, Shakti, will reveal Herself to you in all her glory as your own divine source.

Below is an email from Steve who felt the energy of Satsang deeply.

"Dearest Edji,  I am glad you post your Satsangs, as today I sat down all set to join in and you had us listen to Krishna Das....I couldn't believe it. I looked and it was 4:05. I sat down for a few minutes and next thing, I didn't know, but an hour passed.

"It was a strange time because I could feel the energy of the Satsang Group just coursing through the body and I was seeing a lot of lights and colors rolling in. It was really great and I thought 'I don't even have to be there and the energy is very strong'.  Not realizing that Satsang was in full swing.

"I am glad your going to post it because I caught a little of your talk about the har"a and lowering our focus to the belly area.   Usually during my meditations my whole torso is churning and burning from top to bottom---is that how it is supposed to go?

"Jeez, I hate to miss out on any little tidbit you convey to us."

Love you,  S.

-------------------------

I invite you all to attend our Sunday live Satsangs at 1 PM California time by going to http://satsangwithedji.weebly.com, and use the password   "edji"  each time it is asked. Like Robert's Satsangs, they are entirely free. Recent recorded Satsangs can be found on youtube.com at: https://www.youtube.com/user/edwardmuzika.

LIVE SATSANG SUNDAY JUNE 22, 1PM CALIFORNIA TIME

Go to http://satsangwithedji.weebly.com.

Sign in with the password   "edji" whenever asked (two times).

Then sign in by clicking "Broadcast" to be on camera.

If you come early, listen to some chanting at the bottom of the page to begin to feel Subtle Body energies.

New Email from M about changes

Dear Edji

It is pretty clear to me now that the scales have been removed from eyes that what You are doing is correct,  In fact it resonates  deeply in my heart as to be positively up-lifting.

When you say …

"Once you regard your body as real, and the world is real, you begin a journey of becoming “re-embodied” or “re-incarnated” into humanity.  Indeed, you realize yourself not only as the Absolute principle of “sentience,” Robert's "gap," but also as a physical body, with a mind, energies, and with emotions, existentially embedded into a physical and energetic reality.”

It occurs to me that this is what I have been seeking permission to be, when no permission was needed. I feel that all practices and prayers have lead me to this understanding.

I see that fear was driving me, and I was willingly accepting crumbs from the masters table instead of pulling up a chair next to my-Self, and enjoying the  feast of Self.

Why, because I clung to notion I was not worthy, and held dear my neuroses that told me I was not clever enough, too fearful, too full of resentments, too jealous, to full of self- pity and too angry to fully express my self to you about these things. 

However I did find the courage to write to you and it has been a huge catalyst for “burning” or “cooking” these imagined yet real shortcomings.  I suspect it needed to happen that way The release is freedom and I can begin to laugh at myself yet be cognizant of the “whole” the impermanence within the permanent … and  knowing this underscores fully what it means to be as Robert says often just “BE Yourself”

How can it be other … life is what it is and acting lovingly to all that goes on is paramount, and that includes when things are emotional, erratic, neurotic …  It all belongs and as you say so beautifully ”loving acceptance,” with enough uncertainty to preclude pre-ordination.  

Much love to you Dear Edji …see you at satsang! 

M.

M. Expresses Anger and Confusion After Deeya Left Sangha; My Response.

Below is an email to me from a student confused and angry at me for Deeya’s leaving our Sangha.  I am sure this bother many of you because her presence lit up our Sangha for many. I will not comment on why she left, because I am not certain myself.  Do know she and I continue to love each other, and both of us continue to love all of you out there.

“This is problematic (self-realization) if one is to believe Robert and Ramana that the mind and all it contains is to be emptied … completely!

“This seems an impossibility for as this issue has raised ..we cannot always know what indeed our mind contains … and so the effort will be endless… and futile.

“Perhaps that is why you have deviated from their teachings … I didn’t understand this … I thought you had betrayed your teacher … and lineage…

“Can you see how it is I am so confused ?

“I thought that at the time all the problems with Deeya were surfacing that it was not a coincidence that ALL of Robert’s teachings became available to us.. Such a boon from the sage… a sign …a sign …!  was how I saw it…

“So I have immersed myself totally in his teachings day and night … listening, pondering, practicing …

“The resulting peace and bliss and subtle energies encountered in the void  is wonderful … but it doesn’t last and life and it’s vicissitudes again appear to take over …and of course thinking !

“So to finish I seem to have three choices ..

“1.       Keep doing what Robert recommends diligently and devotedly without expectation…

“2.       Come back fully to you and your teachings , knowing that it is unlikely that I will ever get to be in your presence and receive your Grace…

“3.       Lastly, go back to where it all began with the other Robert (Sailor Bob)- because he is alive and not too far away .... but is a very, very, ‘dry” jnani , and yet if I ignore the words and just be with him … it is so blissful that I want to jump with joy. I have not heard him talk of surrender to the guru… and that is what I really want to do …

“I have great faith in what both you and Robert say about the value of the living teacher …and my most ardent desire is to Self- realize … it just grows and grows …

“I was going to sell up everything and come to you and Deeya … and now that is thwarted….

“So you see I am confounded and confused … can you make any suggestions please…

Ed’s Response:

M, do you know what self-realization means?

It means that you know who you are. That's all. But that means “who you are on all levels,” not just the Absolute level of unchanging Witness, the "source," or Parabrahman.

Sometimes in real life, you are peaceful emptiness, sometimes the witness, sometimes bliss, sometimes lonely, sometimes angry, sometimes sad, sometimes in physical pain.

Then again, that only refers to the waking state.  Other times you are in dream sleep, sometimes in deep sleep, and rarely in what Robert called the gap: the transitional state between dreaming and waking, which Robert sometimes says is the real you (just bare awareness with no thinking, judging or interpreting).

But always you have sentience at the core: the ability to experience, feel and know.

Nisargadatta calls dwelling or resting in this level of your existence, being the witness.

He calls the witness real because that ability to experience and know is required every moment of your life.  It does not change.  Everything else changes.  All experience is in flux. 

Because experience is always changing, Robert calls all experience “unreal” or “illusory.” Nisargadatta agrees.  For them, the only real is dwelling (abiding in) in that deep, impersonal witness state which gives great peace.

Yes, I have deviated from Robert’s and Nisargadatta’s teachings because I do not define everything that happens in Consciousness, that is the experiencing of my entire world of phenomena as well as my own body, my emotions, my hungers, desires, and fears, as being unreal just because they constantly change.

Nisargadatta and Robert would consider loving a cat as unreal because the cat-entity is not permanent. Same with loving a lover.  Neither the lover, nor your body, nor the loving lasts unchanging forever.  The same holds with a stomach ache, tooth ache, hunger, sex, and current dwelling place; everything changes and passes.

So I ask you, do you really want to live that way, not owning your emotions, desires, body, love for animals or other people because these things always pass?

And I ask why would anyone want to live that way?  Is it just so they can dwell in the peacefulness of not being involved with anything or anyone? Is this what you want?  This is what Robert teaches, to have nothing to do with the world, or to take your own problems and frustrations as real and to live more and more in that gap between waking and sleeping, where you are aware of everything, but none of it "touches you"; the phenomena, the emotion, the external event is there, but it does not touch you because there is no you to be present or to take ownership of the emotion or event. 

Yes, it may give great peace for a long time, but it also removes you from the sorrows of life, but also the joys.  It removes you from involvement even though your body and mind live on, but are treated as not real.  Do you really want that?

Remember, the Self-Realization of Robert and Nisargadatta is to rest in the impersonal witness state, the Absolute, just watching joy and sorrows arise and then fall away, without taking ownership of them because they pass. 

Secondarily, in that gap state, there is also no awareness of you as a separate self.  There is no sense of identification or ownership of the emotion, the love, or the external object. Even love takes on this impersonal nature, for there is no self to love, and the object is temporary.

This is exactly the Buddha’s point of view: non-attachment as a goal to find peace.

But I reject this viewpoint as being narrow, and as failing to actually live life, both the downs and also the ups, to the fullest.

I want to live life feeling responsible for the lives of others, of animals and people I love.  

To do that I have to consider them as real, even if they only live a short time, or only stay close a short time.  I regard my love for them as real, and that’s why I feel obligated to be responsible for their well-being.  If I considered them unreal or illusory, why would I care?  This is where Robert and Ramana leave you: indifferent to the world and to others because they are not real, and the love you feel for them or yourself is strictly impersonal; if they suffer, have joy, or die, it does not affect you, your core, because you as a human are also impersonal. For you, you are just that impersonal awareness without identification as a person, and without responsibility.

I deeply reject this.  From living in this state for 15 years an overpowering experience of love came to me and awakened me to the utter, undeniable reality of love and other emotions, and my existence as a sentient being within a world that was real-enough to believe in, even if it changed from moment to moment, and with real persons, animals, and environment that needed to be shepherded and cared for.

It is my reawakened love and compassion for others that make me take this stance.  This is what happened to Buddhism a thousand years after the Buddha.  Mahayana Buddhism was born where the ideal of a snuffing out of desires (Self), or Nirvana, gave way to the Four Vows of rescuing every sentient being in the world “from suffering and distress” before one is allowed to escape suffering into Nirvana. 

This is also the Christian ethic of “Doing onto others as you would have done unto you,” as well to love others as yourself.  Christ was not interested in painting the world as unreal so that you didn’t have to suffer; he wanted everyone to have compassion and love for all sentient beings.

Once you regard your body as real, and the world is real, you begin a journey of becoming “re-embodied” or “re-incarnated” into humanity.  Indeed, you realize yourself not only as the Absolute principle of “sentience,” "the gap," but also as a physical body, with a mind, energies, and with emotions, existentially embedded into a physical and energetic reality.  

You become like Christ: divinity in the form of a sentient presence, come alive in physical form with a karmic destiny, but with enough uncertainty to preclude pre-determination. That is, the need arises to consciously make choices as to how we live, or to do so spontaneously when we live from our heart’s core of loving acceptance of all that we are as well as the same towards the world: loving acceptance.

No M, you do not want to be with a distant, impersonal Jnani, or stay with Robert without regard to what he is saying.  Instead, I ask you to accept all levels of your beingness, including emotions, personal love, responsibilities, your energetic body, and, of course, your transcendent existence as the Absolute.  You are a complete, multi-dimensional being, from Absolute witness, to a physical being infused with Life Force (Shakti), as well as pure sentience (Shiva).

Please come back to Satsang on Sundays. Some day Deeya will return to us with her physical presence, and I know her heart is always with us even though she chooses to be in seclusion now.  Feel the love and the circulating energies and bliss we ALL feel in each others’ healing presence. The Life Force, Shakti, is very strong every Sunday, and we want you back to share in it.

This is the Kind of Visualization/feeling work I used to do post Zen

I did it with my brilliant therapist and friend Eric Reitz, Ph.D. now located in San Raphael.  I have also continued to do this kind of work since, but it is much changed now.  Far more subtle.  I just now more watch the reconnections being built within, as I become re-embodied.

An email to me:

"Last night sinking into that hole in my middle, I didn't

find cold or my father or rebirthing or a void.

It was a large black ball, like a globe, full of velvety

darkness.   As I entered, I felt supported, floating.  An

image of amniotic fluid came.    I wasn't a baby,

though.    Pure consciousness...at Home.

That sense startled me so much that I bounced

out of it, in panic.    So I followed my breath for a

few minutes, then sank back into my middle.   

There was an instanteous release sensation and I was

aware again as consciousness.     The sense was of

being in the center of ....  I don't know...  not really

in the center of anything.    Just  'being center'.

Right now, as I describe it, I feel sudden tingling

energy in my middle.     The term. ...' being center '...

means something important to me.    Right now my

middle feels full of circulating energy, all circulating

around this globe in my belly.

As I'm writing, there is an increasing fullness, pleasure

in my middle....Edji, I feel so happy !!!    What is this?

My middle is both completely full and completely

empty.     Oh my god, I feel so  'at home'.     My belly

has never felt like home before!!!    I'm crying and

laughing..... My god.    I feel so full   so happy. So so

I don't know.  I don't care.   I've never felt at home

before in my body.   Not like this.    This just me

Me feeling pleasure in being me.    I never felt t
this
this. way before. Edji.   Its different from  sexual pleasure. Or the pleasure of being touched or held by someone else.

Its just me being me.  Me holding me?   I don't know

It just MY BELLY.   MINE.   NOT  HIS.  NO BODY ELSE

OWNS ME.  JUST ME. ME ME ME ME.  ALL ME

And me feels warm and full and dark and empty

Wow.........I feel so real.       Hahaha.   12:28pm on Tuesday June 17.  2014.   Syndria feels real !!!
Just human   Edji. Guess what.. I'm human   fully
Human    just like everybody else.  wow
I'm so happy

I hope this doesn't go away.    But even if does...seem

to get lost.    I'll never believe  it.  The same way. That

at  I'm  not real  that I'm not human.   My belly says different

This stuff happens to me when I start writing to you

I go into a different place  start writing  without thinking
Energy starts moving and my perceptions get looser

so that shifts happen.....its getting stronger as I trust you more

I really do have to live by you.  Be in the same space with the you.....my head might actually shoot off

I'll be like that headless guy....won't have to worry about being a rock head....with no head !!!

Gotta make something happen."

Love you,

VIDEO: The Inner Work of Giving and Receiving Love--My favorite Satsang (June 15, 2014)

This is my favorite Satsang by far, so far. Here we talk about discoveries far beyond the discovery of Emptiness and no-separate self, to the discovery of the real Self through learning how to give and receive love.

Love is the Bhaktic way to Self-Realization, and in previous video Satsangs, such as "Self-Inquiry and Self-Realization through love and devotion " we talk about how the growing experience of love leads to identification with it, then to Self-Realization as the Self loves he or she who loves It, and opens Itself completely to the Bhakta.

The present video differentiates between the inner work of love versus the outer work of meditation, mantra, visualizations, scriptures, and self-inquiry, and how the former is what we do in our Sangha in contrast to most teachings that emphasize No-self, Beingness, Nowness, Emptiness, or Isness.  These I describe as purely introductory and "external" teachings compared to the inner transformations created by vulnerability and love.

What will life be like after I am enlightened? Satsang on 6-8-2014

Fallacies of Enlightenment and Self-Realization along with a guided meditation to help you find your hidden depths, bliss, and self-realization.

SATSANG TODAY, SUNDAY JUNE 15, 1:00 PM CALIFORNIA TIME

Go to http://satsangwithedji.weebly.com/

Sign in with the password " edji " asked for two times.

Then go to broadcast to be on video or mike. Please mute microphone.

More about your inner world.

Sedona to Oak Creek Arizona, Beautiful Fall Foliage 2011

AVAILABLE AFTER 2:30 PM SATURDAY 6-14

THE LATEST SATSANG VIDEO. SHARING MY INNER WORLD IN A GUIDED MEDIATION.

Come join us in Satsang. Usually the Shakti strongly circulate around and within the bodies of the participants.

In this video I do a Self-Inspection of my inner world and ask participants to look for same energies, states, bliss, and other phenomena within themselves in a guided mediation.

S's blissful resurrection after previous depression-post a day ago.

 I wanted to ask you about Depression.  How does it feel to you? 

For me I feel like I am locked in a room, alone,  with no windows, very little light, an emptiness that is kind of like draining the spirit out of me. Fear and foreboding dominate and it feels like I can never leave this room unless this body dies...maybe that is why suicide looks like a door out. 

Afraid because this room/experience is something I have always denied existed but I think it has always been here with me, even as a child. Maybe this is where the anger also arises from because I have denied it by blaming other people, places and things.

Edji, what does your depression feel like and how in the heck do you look forward to it. Doesn't it seem foreign?

I am in that room again today and that is why I want to write to you.  

S.

Ed's Response:

I feel lifeless, sad, immobile, but at peace.  Acceptance of temporality and death.

No stories, no rooms, no separation.

S. Responds:

Thank you Edji for this information as it helps me greatly.

After several days of feeling very very depressed a change to absolute total out of this world bliss.  I was listening to Krishna Das and it felt like my Heart Center was doing the singing, it was on fire , just blazing.. I never felt it so strong and deep before.

Also for some reason the Sun, the one in the sky, came in and then I felt like I was in the center of the flames and explosions and Love.  That my heart center was very much like the center of the Sun.

It was wonderful...........but before that the depression was overwheleming.

Thanks for your words Edji.   Love you very much, S.

Ed Responds:.

Amazing isn't it? Under every big depression lies a deep river of bliss that comes from descending deeply into the Self.  When we are really, really depressed, our energies, including our attention is sucked deep inside into a stillness, no movement, no motivation, no action state that is actually quite to to or identical to the bliss body, Satchitananda.

But most people don't know that the depressing situation is there for you to descend inside and find the deep Self there, and they fight the depression.  

Also, the depression is often accompanied by other feelings, images of stories including repressed anger that distracts our attention to the vast ocean of bliss surrounding that deep, empty, lighted state of non-action, non-doing, just being and feeling.

My Self embraces me

Charlie has an inoperable squamous cell carcinoma with a month to live without treatment, and one to three months with treatment.

Two other cats have kidney failure and Kerima’s mother is dying.

I thought depression would come; it usually does for me when there is a big loss, like Robert dying. Normally I welcome its coming; it takes me to the heart of my being where I can rest.

Instead something else came: Stillness, silence, acceptance and utter humility. A state of continuous releasing and letting go.

I look inside and I only find sentience and light sort of spread throughout my imaged body. No sadness, no depression, and thoughts barely rise before they fall away. Just vast stillness like a pond with no wind or disturbance.

In this silence I see deeper than love. Love is connective. This is below that and ontologically prior to love, just as the witness is prior to Consciousness and its sweet quality of love. This state is pure awareness without thought, yet I write to describe is and share it.

This is the ground state of consciousness with nothing added on. Just the flowing forth of the effulgence of Self witnessed by Self.

Consciousness is like the smoldering fire at the tip of an insense stick. From it comes light and smoke illumined by that light. Consciousness comes from a similar process where biological chemicals are turned into sentience. I can witness that burning of Consciousness within my body. It is all so amazing.

And, as I am apart from that burning, and that it makes me aware of, so I am not touched by it.

The Self is so kind. It says Ed you have too much loss now. Come to me; let me hold you close to my bosom and we watch together the players dissolve into Nothingness.

This experience makes me wonder why people resist experiencing sadness and depression so much, because deep within the experiences of depression and loss are all of what I describe above, but usually it is described negatively instead of positively.

All that I described above are found in depression: emptiness, lack of will to do anything (rest), motionlessness (thoughts come slowly), inner silence, feeling of no meaning (thoughts and stories), “don’t know anything mind.” Lastly, the feeling of being pulled downwards or within, away from the world.

Depression merely adds a dark heaviness, sometimes crushing, and additional feelings of being alone or abandoned, and maybe some anger associated with that story.

But if you find the bottom of that depression, you will find that ground state of beingness, light, peace and silence to be there, waiting to embrace you in peace.

 That is why I have always welcomed depression and sadness in the past: it takes me to the root of my being both the witness and that which is witnessed in intense peace and silence.  This time the stories of loss, abandonment, etc., did not come to pollute the peace.

Work Resumes on Editing Third Book.

So much material has been added to possibly be included in the book, and I was out of service with my lung problem for a time, that work on the book was delayed.

I AM ASKING FOR EDITORIAL HELP.

Not too long ago someone named "Haven" volunteered, but I cannot find that email now.  Are you still there?

If you can help please email me at satsang.online(at)gmail(dot)com.

Please give feedback on Satsang

Could you hear me?

If you could, how was your experience of Satsang?

SATSANG TODAY, SUNDAY JUNE 8, 1 PM CALIFORNIA TIME.

Go to satsangwithedji.weebly.com.

Sign in 2 different times with the password "edji."

Then sign in to be on screen.  Listen to chants at bottom before satsang begins to get in the mood.  It helps to be receptive before Satsang begins.

From Steve Eckert: Important!

I have tried the addictive drugs and also experienced the tremendous highs of the Bliss state. They are totally different states with totally different foundations.

The induced drug states are just that, with usually immediate effect and directly concentrated within the nerve system. Usually short term effects that seem to create a demand within the body for more

The Bliss state, has developed for me over time by using Edji's method of focusing on the 'I AM'. A Love state with the 'I AM' also developed over time. This state is much much deeper and does not have a withdrawal episode nor a demand by the body for more. It is very hard to describe why I continue to repeat this meditation day after day for hours on end...Its kind of like being in a cave and very very slowly opening the door to at first a ray of sunlight and because of not ever seeing sunlight wanting to experience more as the sunlight is also an experience of many other dimensions while heroin is boring because the rush is strictly confined to the nervous system.

Like they say in AA - you take a drink and sooner or later the drink takes you. You need more heroin and more heroin to sustain that original high. In Vietnam mamma-sans would leave 95% pure heroin on your bed...a free gift from your local Viet Cong.

What a excellent way to destroy an Army and it worked.
They never left a book on meditation on my bed.

In the Bliss state attained through meditation the feeling of peace and well being is always available and deepens and deepens with no dreaded effects upon the body. Actually the importance of the body diminishes, for me it is useful only for meditation.

When it boils down the Bliss state is only a small part of the whole. The acceptance of the states of depression, anger, hate, sadness, fear (this is damn difficult) actually balances out in higher and higher states of Bliss. This way you keep your expanding Humanity.

I know the Bliss state is not the desired goal as taught by Edji. Far more important is Self-Realization.

To Waldo Thompson

Waldo, I will take down the Sirius blog and the posts about you on this one if you provide me a complete accounting for "Self-Realization and Other Awakenings."  Also, please send me the 1099 you claim you sent the IRS, but never sent me.  I cannot understand how your check for $288 and the income gained from sales on my website after all the expense deductions you took were anyway near even $1,000.

I have no idea of how many books were sold on Amazon, Barnes and Noble or through other distributors, nor the income you received from them.

I am posting this because I cannot contact you any other way.

STUNNED AND HEARTBROKEN

About seven years ago three adorable kittens came into our home.  Tiny, tiny.  All three could fit in my left hand.  Charly, Maxie, and Freddie were between 6-8 weeks old.

Charly was the runt and had his eyes were running constantly. But Charly grew up into a prince’s body: tall, elegant, and lean.

Unlike boisterous and talkative Maxie, or powerful and energetic Freddie, Charly was very laid back, gentle, and affectionate.

About two and a half years ago Charly developed stomatitis, the bane of our household, which is a painful inflammation of the gums and throat. The initial treatment is teeth cleaning, and if that does not work, long lasting steroids. When that does not work, the recommended treatment is removing all the cats teeth except the canines.  We delayed that treatment because of cost. Cat dentistry today is enormously expensive now, at least in Los Angeles, with X-rays, anesthesia, surgery, etc., just getting the teeth cleaned can cost $500-$700 at the better vet clinics and higher with a specialist.

Four weeks ago we decided we had to get Charly’s teeth removed, the inflammation was terrible and he had been losing weight from the pain of eating for 6 months or more.

We took him to Dr. Tsugawa of Culver City, the most highly recommended dentist-specialist in Los Angeles.  All of Charlys non-canines were removed uneventfully. And we were right to be concerned about the cost: $1,879!

Two weeks later we brought him back for a recheck.  Unfortunately Charley had a major swelling on the left side lower jaw and a bit of swelling on his left cheek area.  He was started on two weeks of Clavamox to fight a possible infection. Dr. Tsugawa said he had never encountered a case like this where swelling developed after surgery.  He gave Charley another two weeks of Clavamox. 

Two weeks later we brought Charly back.  The swelling on the lower jaw, a lymph node, was smaller, but the cheek was puffier. Tsugawa warned us to watch the left eye, whether it bagan to water. Tsugawa gave another two weeks of Clavamox. Total antibiotic cost was $140 for four weeks.

About 10 days later, Charley’s left eye began to water and we brought Charley back the next available appointment.

Tsugawa’s guess was that it was cancer, a carcinoma.  He second-guessed himself for not being more suspicious of the swelling when we brought him for the first follow up and performed a needle aspirate biopsy to the tune of $807.  We are awaiting the results, but cancer is almost certain. Dr. Tsugawa was certain the tumor was extensive and had already gone behind the eye and was inoperable.

Tsugawa speculated that the cancer developed within the stomatitis inflammation, and surgery disturbed the statis quo, allowing the cancer to grow aggressively.

Without further treatment, Charley would have three months to live.  With aggressive treatment, meaning removing the left eye and extensive radiation treatment costing maybe $4,000 for both, he might have a year to live!

Charly at age 2

We have been faced with such critical decisions before and always opted the expensive, extensive treatment way.  But this time, though we have scheduled an appointment with a radiation oncologist, we will have extensive second thoughts about getting it for Charley.  The treatment will be invasive, painful, and really only give him an extra nine months of life and an even more extensive emotional investment.  For me, when I am working with a terminal cat, my heart gets totally invested in their health, and when they die, I go numb for a long time.

Is it better for Charly and for us to give him the best three months of his life and then put him to sleep when the pain gets too bad, or to operate and irradiate, and out his death off another nine months but also with constant treatment?

When Satchi died the same year as Robert Adams, I went into a three year depression.  When Gopi died in 2008, again a depression and angst.

Since then so many died including Gracie, Dustin, his sister, and Lakshmi.  Each death takes a toll on me.

What  do you think?

Charly at age 4

SATSANG TODAY, SUNDAY JUNE 1, AT 1 PM CALIFORNIA TIME.

GOT THAT, 1 PM? NOT 2 PM.

Go to http://satsangwithedji.weebly.com.

Enter with the word "edji"  used on two different screens.  Then "start broadcasting" to become visible.

More about "energies."