Self-Knowledge and Self-Realization

Of Energies, Ecstasies and Orgasms

Many of the readers of this blog or Facebook have noted that several students are continuously speaking of energies they feel, currents traveling through their body or sense of presence. Sometimes the energies are extremely pleasurable, turning into bliss as the currents move, and then into ecstasies once the movements stop and the body/presence is “filled.”

The most common experience with these energies are intense love and orgasms in women, either of the genital sort, or most often felt in the heart.  Then the orgasms spread to the entire body and become so intense that one feels they are going to explode. See, you who have dwelled in your head, are now becoming intimately aware of your bodies and sense of presence.

These energies have a million manifestations and are always accompanied by feeling ecstatic love and grace at some point. One just wants to surrender to God or Guru or to another person who is an external representation of your own Self.

Sometimes the energies flow intensely for days or weeks (or years) at a time.  One becomes incapacitated.  Feeling the bliss and orgasms, one’s attention to the external world ceases. The inner world work of the energies and bliss is so captivating that one becomes useless in the world.

Chores do not get done.  Children and spouses are ignored.  One’s ability to maintain employment is severely compromised.  One is beginning to be aware of the bliss of the Self.

Then the struggle begins to continue to remain in the external world.  One feels guilty for ignoring the children and fear arises for their continued employment. One begins to do all sorts of things to bring these energies and “attachment” to the ecstasies and orgasms under control, but to no avail.

Once you have been bitten by the ecstasies and orgasms, they will stay and bug you until you stop trying to control them.  Just let them pass through.  Force yourself to work and pay attention to the kids when you can, but other times, go off by yourself and let the energies flow.

Along with the energies and orgasms, comes the arising of all kinds of intense emotions, from anger and hate, to the most sublime forms of love, surrender, and peace.  One begins to oscillate between poles of pleasure, love and peace, to outrage, hate and destructive breaking.  It is as if you had become two years old again.

So, what do these ecstatic states mean?  Why are they there?  What is to be done with them?

First, you have top recognize they do not happen to all people.  Really, only a subset of highly emotional and sensitive people encounter these experiences during their Sadhana.  These people often are healers and empaths, highly sensitive already to their inner states and the inner states of others.  Also, they occur far more often in women than in men.  Often too, these people have had “broken” childhoods that have left “fissures” in their personality structures that allow easy access to unconscious movements in the “Id,” the pre-egoic unconsciousness.

Secondly, you need to recognize that the ecstasies are always there, but when you begin practice, either by going deep inside and finding, then loving your sense of self, or by loving someone else as an object-substitute for your own Self, maybe for the first time, your attention, your energy leaves your brain and thinking, and you become aware of these energies that are always there and moving and “playing” within you.

You have become aware of a deeper part of yourself, a deeper level of consciousness, and this is good.  The ecstasies and bliss mean you are escaping from the mind.  It turns your attention towards your heart, your gut, and your genitals.  Really, it is quite liberating.  You become alive again.  You have escaped the poverty of mental life and also quietism of superficial meditation states. The pleasure of the ecstasies turns your attention away from thinking, doing, planning and performing, towards just being inside yourself.

But, you will soon learn that all these experiences are just temporary, and they are not YOU.  They just happen to you, just as do thoughts and thinking.  They are separate from you and do not really affect YOU, the witness at all.

However, they are also harbingers of the event of Self-Realization, where the Self reveals itself to you, the little I, as the big I.  Then you will fall to your knees in worship of God and guru, who are really you.

This whole area of energies can be immensely fascinating, but at some point you have to move on.  It is not you that moves on, but your attention moves on.  You see the energies and orgasms for what they are, just another set of phenomena, and they really have nothing to do with you.  Nor are they really in your body.  They are really in your sense of presence, and as such, you move beyond a body-identification towards an identification with consciousness itself.

However, the most difficult “annoyance” that occurs to most who are experiencing sensitivity to these inner movements, is the arising of some extremely painful emotions and often terrifying hallucinations, and great fear. Fear of being destroyed, fear of going insane because these experiences are so unlike anything you experienced before.

There is often jealousy as you associate the love or ecstasies you feel as having an object source outside of you, a lover, a guru, or God, and you feel your ecstasies and orgasms can be taken away if that external representation of your own true Self, even looks at another person, or does not pay enough attention to you.  There is an intense regression to being a two or a four year old level of personality.

Now you are even less engaged in the world and you feel more guilty for being  so child-like and dependent.


But you see, you are being prepared for a new life, one centered in your own beingness and heart as opposed to living from a role and concepts.


Utilizing the spontaneous sexual energies, and non-sexual energy flows within the body and one's sense of presence, triples the benefits of just turning within and focusing on the I Am. It gives self-abidance practice real juice, a wetness that Ramana-style self-inquiry lacks. It leads to loving the apparently external other with such passion and abandon that you lose the small self, who just wants to surrender and die in that other.  Then comes the big surprise one day in a recognition that the immense love and surrender you feel is really you.  It is your true nature, and the love just flows and flows, coming from a directly perceived Self that absorbs and swallows the small I, leaving one living from the heart. 

Now, some remarks on managing the processes. 


Don’t take these energies or sexuality too seriously.  All this stuff will pass.  Just enjoy these preparatory processes while they last.  If your husband or wife leaves you because you can pay enough attention to them, so be it.  They were not meant to stay longer in your life.  The same with your job.  Maybe you were not meant to be a V.P. of finance or Information Technology.  Maybe you want a simpler employment, or maybe you want to become a teacher yourself by mastering all levels of the teachings, the Dharma.

Also, the energies are exacerbated when you don’t eat or go on a fast. Don’t fast in an attempt the enhance or decrease the energies, they will only get out of control this way.

Eat three or four times a day.  Try, try, try to get some sound sleep even if you have to take medications to do it, because good sleep is usually one of the first victims of the arising energies.

Try to repress nothing. Just let the energies and emotions flow through you.  In fact, if you try to impede them in any way, you will soon see your powerlessness to stop the volcano.

Do not do any Kundalini or tantric exercises while this is going on.  The energies will get out of control this way.  Do not do too much meditation at this time.  This level of your beingness needs to be fully explored and integrated before you do deeper. Just go out on the back porch, or to a park, sit quietly and let the energies and emotions race through you.  Just watch, see how they are not you.

I am really against engaging in any sort of practices to manage or control these energies, because you will likely get even more attached to them and utilizing them.  Let them spontaneously flow through you.  Trust that the Shakti knows the way to self-realization as it is unfolding through you better than any teachnique you might learn to modify or control it.

Just realize that soon all these states will pass in the sense that it is your attention to them and the pleasure of them that is sustaining them.  They all will pass and you will sink lower into even more silent and peaceful levels, not so jarring or enthralling as constant orgasms.  Take them only as being a sign of progress.  Nothing more. But even more importantly, relax and enjoy them as much as you can.  Get passive and enjoy them. Take them as a movement of the divine Self within you.