Self-Knowledge and Self-Realization

FROM SYNDRIA ON THE VIDEO "GIVING AND RECEIVING LOVE, JUNE 15, 2015 FOUND ON MY BLOG AT http://itisnotreal.blogsot.com.

That was a most powerful Satsang for me. You described so clearly being lost in emptiness, just as I had been. You made it so I could actually feel , during the Satsang, my attachment to emptiness as a resistance to feeling open and vulnerable in my heart. 

It was so freeing to me when you described learning to love another as necessary, not some hindrance to be turned into a distant spiritualized perfect love. 

When I watch the videos of Satsangs I attended, it takes me right there again. Although more and more, with new impressions, too, that help me to see and hear you more fully now. 

Very precious to me, how much you share in a clear, non jargon way directly from your own experience. That helped me greatly to trust you. You guide from the map inside you, rather than a map on paper. 

Maybe its too intimate, too demanding of vulnerability for many people. Having spiritual concepts as maps is much easier to feel safe, think we're growing but really just hiding out. 

I have done a lot that myself. In fact, I feared that I had myself walled into such a confusing labyrinth of self trickery that I would die in self-created terror. Helpless and hopeless to the end. 

But, Edji you pointed the way into my heart and have stayed the course with me, helping me gain strength and courage to explore my own inner world, find Self in my unique way. 

I never felt uniquely beautiful before this. Now I'm slowly unwrapping the old dead skins covering over the light of my heart. The immensity of I AM ...wow ... I glimpse it only ...yet it knocks the breath out of me.

I don't know much, but I feel Self pressing against every damn concept
left in me...something is going to give ...

Thank you, Edji. I could never do this alone. I don't get it, that so many people can't recognize the keen-eyed teacher right in front of them. Sad..