Self-Knowledge and Self-Realization

Something strange has happened to me.  I have become the laziest, self-satisfied human that I know.  I no loner desire the company of other humans by going to a coffee shop in the mornings. I just stay home with my cats watching them play with each other, argue, knock things off of the table, vomit, and otherwise draw attention to themselves.

I happily do nothing.  No reading tempts me.  I force myself to walk a mile every other day gradually recovering my pre-surgery strength. 

On the odd days I begin practicing kettlebell swings for core strength--but reluctantly.

Not knowing what else to do I play on Facebook and answer many emails from seekers all over the world.

I eat four times a day, often a meal with two of the delicious, sweet and very juicy oranges from my back yard.  Max can tell you about these--and Max, they are sweeter now than when you were here.

I watch a gaggle of five geese that like staying close to my back yard on the golf course while I read about Steve's and Syndria's and Shane's and others' experiences of Shakti, enjoying them thoroughly.

Then I take out my cheap 7X35 binoculars for a closer view of the wildlife all the while I am in a T-shirt because the daytime temperatures are in the 70s and once in the while low 80s.  I read about the horrors of the snows and sub-zero cold in the East and genuinely feel sorry for people living there, and fo all the cats and wildlife that have died during the repeated freezes.

I don't even feel an urge to get a car or even a golf cart to go shopping or ride around the local streets--for I am at peace.

I have Almass's new book onthe table who talsk about living a life of continuous self-discovery, of endless paths, old and new, recognizing that there are infinite potential end states not just the ones listed by Ramana, Nisargadatta, Buddha, or Christ, and that each of us has an opportunity for forging a new path after any basic awakening on any traditional path.  A life of continuous exploration, with no final awakening whether it be to Christ Consciousness, the Witness beyond Consciousness, Jan Esmann's Sahaj Samadhi after 33 years of pranayama and visualizations, or Robert's silence.  

Yet I cannot move myself to read it even though that is exactly my view which I set forward in Self-Realization and Other Awakenings where I talk about a spiritual mansion with a thousand different rooms of states and experiences, and which any one human can only explore a few.

Right now I am forging a path of peaceful nothingness, a subtle happiness, and rest, rest, resting in mySelf. Maybe tomorrow will bring a new path?