BUTTERFLY
STUDENTS
Robert said he
had no desire to have a lot of students. He wanted ten who would stay with him
no matter what happened, no matter what he did or what he said.
You see, Robert
was not of this world, not of the mundane world of humanity. He wanted to take
you to God and then even beyond God. He wanted to take you beyond all words,
all concepts, and all human points of view. To that end he was always doing
actions to drive students away, or at least to test them. Few could tolerate
his lack of ego stroking. He burned people with his words and actions. So they
ran away to nw teachers who spoke nicely, and never hurt their feelings.
Even I did not
stay with him all the way. I could not move with him to Sedona even though I
was the one who instigated the move. Shakti would not let me move with him.
Mary moved with him, but she had already abandoned him in her heart because of
Robert’s, what Mary called, his womanizing.
Robert moved to
Sedona and found all the students there to be liars and manipulators, and all
failed to support him as they had promised to do in order to entice him to move
there. Robert even told me ahead of time that none would keep their promises.
Now I feel
similarly to how he felt. So far, even my most advanced students have been
butterflies, hopping from one teacher to another, or one environment to
another.
You see, all
teachings are false, only words. When you are without words and concepts the
whole world changes into a kaleidoscope of changing images, objects, emptiness,
fullness that keeps changing and you are that totality. You relax into that.
Everything flows and yet you feel the power of Shakti within and around you, a
quiet yet massive presence always there with you, holding you, loving you and
you loving her. You don’t have to destroy the mind, but you do have to drop
deeper into your body and the subtle bodies below it.
I am still
looking for students who are not butterflies and who can stay and take my train
to God.
No comments:
Post a Comment