16 April 2015

Email to me:

Dear Edji,

I ressonate a lot with several of Steve's recent experiences. I've also had that experience of your heart center as divine. Or at other times: My heartcenter is your heart center or there's an Edji placed in my heart and focusing on it sends me into bliss.

When I move around in the world things are quite normal, but as soon as I take a break and relax there's bliss and a humming in the body.

I have to learn a lot of new procedures at work at the moment and I feel sooo stupid and slow. My brain doesn't want to take in new information: I'd rather just be absorbed by all the things which goes on inside. In the end things seem to work out. I do what I need to do on an almost unconscious level where I wouldn't be able to explain what I'm actually doing.

There's both a fear of and a desire to give up and become totally dysfunctional.

Energy is often strong in the evening and night, especially when I've been listening to chantings. A few days ago everything was green when I closed my eyes. All kinds of green moving and changing.

Thank you so much for this path, Edji.

My Response:

Yes there is a lot of heart energy and light as well as bliss on this path of discovering the Manifest Self.

Yes, the desire to be nothing except the experiences of bliss, love, light,and energies is sometimes very strong; the desire to become "dysfunctional," is a desire just to be Self alone and forget human responsibilities..

Some actually enjoy going into a mental hospital to rest in bliss and be taken care of.

Some would view what I say with horror, as if such a vew were crazy or irresponsible. But the life of the Self transcends all such mundane judgments. If you want to know and be your Self, it requires a total dedication to the task no matter what the consequences.

I remember early on in my path having so many Kundalini experiences I thought I was going insane, but I persisted because knew the life I, and all others, was living was the true insanity.


  1. Right now a Mental Hospital would be an excellent step...gladly give up the World.
    I talked to a close associate of Adyashanti....Adyashanti spent 6 months on a mental ward. Earthly responsibilities get to be a real drag.

  2. Dr. Malidoma Patrice Somé understands something about those who get labeled mentally ill that people from the west often cannot see. In the shamanic view, mental illness signals “the birth of a healer,” explains Malidoma Patrice Somé. Thus, mental disorders are spiritual emergencies, spiritual crises, and need to be regarded as such to aid the healer in being born

    “I was so shocked. That was the first time I was brought face to face with what is done here (In the West) to people exhibiting the same symptoms I’ve seen in my village.” What struck Dr. Somé was that the attention given to such symptoms was based on pathology, on the idea that the condition is something that needs to stop. This was in complete opposition to the way his culture views such a situation.
    So this is how the healers who are attempting to be born are treated in this culture.
    What a loss! What those in the West view as mental illness, the Dagara people regard as “good news from the other world.”

  3. This is an interesting post:) I was diagnosed as bipolar a couple years ago after some prolific experiences in meditation. I currently take Prozac and olanzapine, but not much has changed. I yearn to continue my practice but have not from fear of completely losing it!