20 February 2013



I have described in the past experiencing love as a flowing internal river, flowing from the gut, into the heart and upwards into the head and out, or directly from the heart to another.  This internal flow usually has a golden or white light, and internal river of light moving through the body and one’s sense of presence and outward into the world.

I have described bliss similarly, as an energy moving and flowing within, upwards and outwards, and when the bliss stops flowing, it fills one’s beingness with a static energy of ecstasy, and it feels like one is going to explode in a titanic orgasm.

But there is something beyond love, beyond bliss, beyond ecstasy, which is being so bewitched by the other, whether it comes in the form of an external beloved, or internally, as a vision of god or goddess, or as the Self, the fundamental power of the universe, that one falls on their knees in gratitude and grace, wanting nothing more than to serve that beloved.  The whole world wants nothing more than to serve your beloved also.  You all bow in worship, in service to that other, which is none other than YOU, the Self of all, in the other.

This surrender feeling, this grace is totally unlike “normal” love.  It may be called divine love, but it is really you at your deepest layer.  It doesn’t overpower you like bliss or ecstasy with a kind of physicality.  It is far more refined, and rather than the love or bliss having the light, the whole world seems bathed in this smoother, gentler grace.

Then you are happy, happier than ever before except for a few times in life what you felt this same way.  The happiness has no properties.  You are not happy because of something, you are happiness itself.  Not lotto winning happiness, but God-winning happiness, so sublime that even Rumi falls short of describing it.

After a rough start to the day, I began feeling this again in the afternoon and evening: grace so sublime flowing from my complete surrender to my own internal beloved however triggered by external events.

This is the grace of I Am.  This is the grace that flows from loving God, goddess or guru.  It comes sometimes when one’s will or self-mastery is most sorely challenged, when you feel your greatest humiliation or failing. At other times it comes without sign or reason.  But it does come and it comes ever more frequently when you love another or when you love your own self.

Today I felt this and had a vision of the purpose of our future ashram and how it will change everything.  I see it very clearly now and even see some of those who will be involved.

Our book is now going to the printers and will be available very soon in print directly, or on Amazon and Kindle.  It is entitled “Self-Realization and other awakenings.” 


  1. It seems i was tasting some sparks of what you are living ... a few days ago , i was listening the "poem of atoms" on the Deeya s' page and suddenly that made me completely submerged by an immense feeling of "the Beauty" ". ...it was a very very subtil and deep feeling and it seemed as if it was your presence , vast, smooth and so wonderful subtil loving ...
    so much happy to know you ...

  2. At last
    My love has come along
    My lonely days are over
    And life is like a song

    Oh yeah yeah, at last
    The skies above are blue
    My heart was wrapped up in clover
    The night I looked at you

    And I found a dream that I could speak to
    A dream that I can call my own
    I found a thrill to press my cheek to
    A thrill that I have never known

    Oh yeah yeah, and you smile, you smile Oh, and then the spell was cast And here we are in Heaven For you are mine at last

    At Long Bloody Last...:-)

  3. Wonderful words make up this illusion ...

    I miss the times of your original way to give pointers face to face.

    But times are changing.


  4. Hurrah! Hurray! Joyful celebrations!
    Jai Sri Edji!

  5. Beautiful! I aspire to this by you, edji. -Rich