17 June 2017

Below are three emails from Matti. He sent his first answer seeking email during June 2010, a period of seven years and 412 emails. I have posted several of his emails and my responses over the years, because his experiences were similar to my own. The problem was that though Matti was VERY dedicated, he was never able to stabilize for long until h had an awakening experience maybe a year ago, and just disappeared abruptly for a while.

Now he is back having traversed the foothills of enlightenment, to approaching the culmination of his journey.

Below are three emails that speak for themselves and range over both realization of the Manifest Self to transcending consciousness itself, entering the total freedom of going beyond life and death. I am quite proud of Matti.


Dear Ed,

I feel the presence of God or Divine inside me and around me. It is not just me that is here at the moment, but there is also "someone" else. That someone is not equal to me but is much, much more. It's not God as such, but the beingness of something extraordinary and grand. A glorious presence is here with me and we relate to each other in an intimate way. Truly wonderful.

Dear Ed,

I feel my body relaxing and almost falling asleep. Consciousness dims down and I melt into nothingness that somehow exists. There is the bright Consciousness and then beyond that there is special nothingness where I am beyond the bright light of existence. It feels like that is my true home and all Consciousness is really just fickle and mercurial, like something secondary. My eyes open and I emerge from that nothingness into my body and mind. I feel refreshed.

Dear Ed

Everything is hollow. Literally empty. Just 2-dimesional surfaces glued together. Inside, outside, coarse, subtle and existence and being and everything else is like holograms. Nothingness has transformed into empty void space that fills everything. Like computer graphics. Freedom! Just freedom.


From the Yoga Vasistha as translated by swami Venkatesananda, volume 1, chapter 3, page 9.

Rama asked: Lord, what are the characteristics of a Jivanmukta who is liberated while living?

Vasistha replied:

He who, while living and apparently normal life, experiences the whole world as an emptiness, is a Jivanmukta. He is awake but enjoys the calmness of a deep sleep; he is unaffected in the lease by pleasure and pain. He is awake and deep sleep; but he is never awake to this world. His wisdom is unclouded by latent tendencies. He appears to be subject to the likes, dislikes and fear; but in fact he is as free as space. He is free from egotism and religion; his intelligence is unattached whether an action or inaction. None is afraid of him; he is afraid of none. He becomes a Videhamukta when the body is dropped.

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