KALI's EYE

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She is the house Mistress, greeting everyone at the door, from family to stranger, all of whom she promptly displays her love.

FROM PURUSHOTTAM

Dear Edji,

It has been more than a year that I have contacted you in any form but I have been following you diligently. the thing is that I did not have any progressive overview on the self during this period.

Dear Edji, but three days ago something happened and as I do not know what is that I want to share it with you and beg for your insights on this whether this is the mind talking or if it corroborates with the truth that you have been talking.

What I come to know now is that all the words that we have been using in the spiritual world cannot give the test of the reality. I have put the last three days' experiences below. Please comment on these:

9th June: I was scanning the body and feeling the whole inner sensation. the whole body became one energy field and for the first time I feel the sense of presence. For the first time for its entirety I know that I-exist. Another thing is that that presence is not an objective reality but in real me, Myself. But somehow I dare not claim that to be me. That is bigger/greater/immense than me. Instantly I feel that I am not. I do not exist as a self. There is nothing inside which I could claim to be me but only this Presence which is me in my core form and is not me at the same time. I cannot exactly explain  this feeling in words. Edji, is this what you have been talking about?

10th June: I perfectly know that there is no entity in this body/mind known as Purushottam as an I. Everything is happening in and around this body but the receiver, the author or the doer seems to be absent. But everything is happening perfectly as before. Now I have a certain freedom that I can focus my attention in any way as it is required but at the same time the point of view of the looker has changed somehow. I am feeling this presence as my core reality.

11th June:  Only two hours of sleep. Unable to sleep due to mosquito buzzing all around. The body was panicking. Mind frustrated. But what was that which was untouched? Yes, there was something as a presence in the background. Linguistically I was sensing its presence but I now know that That is what I am in real without any sense of selfhood. Life now has become a paradox. The known, the cultured and the false sense of I-ness has collapsed. The identification has been broken. There is no I inside but still there is something which is so alive, more alive than what was there before. What is this? But there is a little bit fear inside. Certain sense of insecurity here. What to do, how to cope with this new situation? But there is no other way than follow, Be and love this Presence.

Dear Edji, these are what going on into me. For the first time I am not sure of anything. I come to know that words cannot help me anymore but only he who has been in this process himself. Please guide me.

With love and gratitude,

Purushottam Pant

Nepal

--------------------------------------------- 

MY RESPONSE:

Purushottam,

Now that you have realized your sense of presence and broken your identification with the personal sense of I, and maybe even with your body, you have transitioned into the foothills of great enlightenment.

Just keep doing what you have been doing, and read slowly, and very openly, the first 5 chapters of Nisargadatta's Ultimate Medicine.  I think it is available on the wearesentience.com website.  It will reinforce what you have grasped.  Using his written words is like having me available to you all the time, reinforcing your “progression” of no progression.

You are blessed.

Ed

Deeya's Soulful Response

DEEYA'S SOULFUL RRSPONSE

Yes. It is that. The play of life and death. Of Nataraja, the Cosmic Dancer. Hence the hospice servitude of both me and Keri Ma. It's ever present. And yes, I saw that early, with the shocking suddenness of my father, as did you; It was witnessed through working with countless veterinarians, farmers, and even from viewing slaughter houses... It was seen with the car wreck, through the death of my husband, with the passing of all my grandparents (including my mother's mother at 100), in my working at the coroner's office, then also with every dog I ever had, all my early teachers. It is there... silently waiting to take, to reclaim that life force... In every manifestation I have seen it, in every direction and in every relation... (eventually so)... and also in all of the who and the what that I thought I was and wasn't too... In all of the coming and going of the phenomenal and the multi-dimensional. And so here we are.

Are you familiar with 'Adonis,' the poem of Percy Bysshe Shelley. A favourite stanza from that is this one... especially the line in orange.

The One remains, the many change and pass;
Heaven’s light forever shines, Earth’s shadows fly;
Life, like a dome of many-coloured glass, 30
Stains the white radiance of Eternity,
Until Death tramples it to fragments.—Die,
If thou wouldst be with that which thou dost seek!
Follow where all is fled!—Rome’s azure sky,
Flowers, ruins, statues, music, words, are weak 35
The glory they transfuse with fitting truth to speak.

I am perfectly at peace on hearing that you are now with Robert and that all is settled. And I knew all along about Michael. Innumerable of the best and happiest days of my light are those illumined with you, he, and the Sanghees... 

Being with you shopping in Ralph's was an absolutely unforgettable highlight of my heart; Satsang on the sundeck of Mae West's place in Santa Monica, lapped by the sound of the ocean; The magic, majesty and mystery of pelicans accompanying us in flight, right beside us, as we drove along the coast to Malibu; Swans on the lake as we circled the Shrine at Self Realize the nation; Catching your falling tears as we set Lakshmi free; And of course, your infinite capacity in listening... to my little child's heart break... over and over and over again... at all the pain of loss and life and of what really is... and isn't. Was it Jean Dunne who said "Consciousness reveals all it's secrets..."

FROM STEVE

"From Edji: Just keep reading Nisargadatta, Ultimate Medicine, Prior to Consciousness, etc. Then something will click."

Sri Edji, Click, click, clit,.....Many different things popping up.

One day I knew I was never born and my legs were gone. Felt light

Last night before I was born, no duality. NO and never was a Jesus Christ, Buddha, Allah, my family,cars, house, Edji, and never was there a World.

Then the question why stay in this illusion after awakening??

What would be the purpose it is all a sham?

Some days the bliss just kicks my ass....especially with this full moon.

I do fall in Love with the animals, wasps, ants, just any little bug is so so beautiful. I don't know why I see such beauty in them all, feeding them and taking them out of danger....its just a blast. Maybe I shouldn't ask any questions just go with the flow.

I was indoctrinated since this "fake birth" and am realizing that absolutely everything I was told and read is just someone's else's idea. From grade school to college, Catholic school, U.S. Army, spirituality ......just everything is and was just B.S.

Rode down into the tube of death....what wonders to behold!

Edji, this is an unbelievable venture. If you didn't pick me to be your student this would never happen.

HOW many millions or billions of years have I been lost? How many times did the dissolution of the Universe take place?

I have fear of nothing. Not even my deepest fears have any meaning anymore.

I have to thank you Edji for calling me. You are the most honest, down to earth, loving person in the World and the best guide there is for those seeking Self-Realization.

Love you deeply, steve

Using emotions as a portal to realization of the Manifest Self.

You need to be flexible when investigating the various levels of one's inner experience, sometimes strongly practicing self-inquiry or self-abidance, and at other times, shifting one's attention to one's reactions to the external world, or the arising of strong emotions within oneself.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JnZxbLhE3l4

A 40 minute film of Ramana Narrated by Robert Adams.

The video speaks of Robert's meetings with Ramana.  I also was the one that transcribed the first audio of Robert's narration. Robert told me to change the word "rickshaw" to bullock cart.  To this day, some transcripts use rickshaw, while other us   bullock cart.  Who knows?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2zPV42dnJU&feature=share

FROM DEEYA:

So relieved you delayed the surgery.   My love to you, your mother, Kerima, Michael... 

Perhaps the sky too is sad...  It's been pouring here since many days.

Can I take it from you Ed...?   Help in any way?  Holding you all close.

Let me know which day, as things unfold.

MY RESPONSE:

In the end, it is all about life and death, is it not?  You with your father, and me with my father in 1956, and now with my mother, my only living relative.  Watching her at almost 100 and during the last days of her life in her usual equanimity and good spirits, but with a failing body.

In a sense, these last days--they may be her last days or she might pop back--are again focusing my attention on my own consciousness, and with the thousandth-time rediscovery that I am not it.  It is just there, like a handheld flaming torch held at arms’ length with the fire burning bright, then waxing and waning, and my consciousness is like that.  The only difference is that the torch illuminates the world without, while conscious illuminates the world within, and in the case of a human being, the "within" also contains the external world as an appearance of a without.

But it is still all just a brief light show that is self-contained, and within which we find the appearance of a personal identity and an apparent body, which is also an appearance in that play of light.  There is nothing there.  It is like hand shadows cast by fingers and hands in a light beam onto a wall.  No more than that.  All the other stuff, emotions, wants, needs, judgments, morality and ethics--all gone!

And I observe, neither interested or uninterested, and not feeling anything, no relation, no pity, no despair, no happiness, no sadness, sensations untouched by the filters of human evaluative consciousness.  Thus, I am now with Robert, And It Really Is Good!  All the wars are over.  All the goals have been won or lost and no more arise, hoping my mother will continue towards a peaceful death.

Michael has been a godsend.  I have finally accepted him fully as a son and now see very positive spiritual future for him.  He is a good person.  He is very gentle and loving and caretaking with my mother.  I appreciate him highly.  And Kali loves him too.

BIG DECISIONS

My mother has suddenly got much worse. Very weak, confused and disoriented after being kicked out of Banner Boswell ER.

And, her Sunday morning caretaker never showed up! When I visited her at 2PM, she was still in bed, confused, cold, and in intense pain from her urinary infection.

I called her care service and they sent someone immediately. Her Saturday caretakers had not picked up her antibiotics, so her infection was untreated until I picked up the Cypro snday afternoon.

Today, I have to see her condition. I may have to cancel tomorrow's hip surgery to make sure my mother will be OK. It is up to me as the medical and caretaking systems have failed her, I can not bare the thought of being in the hospital and losing my mother while there recovering from my own trauma.

I CANCELLED SURGERY FOR TOMORROW AND IT WILL BE RESCHEDULED FOR JULY!

Like

C

Telling Truth to Each Other

The link below is the talk I would have delivered had we been able to get online together for satsang. Truth Telling, from me to you. What you need to know from me about getting to where you want to go—or not!

https://youtu.be/ksPhgprtKCk

Elder Abuse at Banner Boswell ER in Sun City AZ

Last Sunday I visited my 99 year-old mother (Helen Alder) at her home and found her to be very lethargic, not alert, and generally out of it.  Her caretaker said that her feet had become very swollen, and they had not been when I saw her two weeks before.  The caretaker also said she is barely eating, and has stopped walking from her chair to the bathroom and had started to relieve herself in protective panties.  She only walks in the morning from her bed in the bedroom, to chair the front room, and back again at night.

This is absolutely abnormal for my mother who usually can walk fairly rapidly throughout the house.  That she was not eating, not reading the newspaper or doing crossword puzzles which she always did.  I was very concerned and called her doctor, who responded to my call the next day, and came out to see my mother on Tuesday, performed an evaluation, and drew several vials of blood for testing.  Results came back on Friday morning, June 2.  The nurse practitioner, Susan Ward, called me on Friday morning saying she was quite concerned because two of the blood tests came back with highly abnormal readings.  This coupled with her behavioral change and lack of eating, indicated to her, an urgent need to go to an emergency room to be checked for blood clotting and congestive heart failure.

Paramedics took my mom to the Banner Boswell ER on Thunderbird in Sun City Arizona on Friday, June 2, 11 AM.  Before any tests were taken, the doctor (Jones) walked in the room, just after my mother had her vitals taken by a nurse, very chipper and happy with a loud voice saying, “You look fine.”  I explained the situation and her behaviors, and he asked if she was back to normal now.  I said no, my mother did not even understand sometimes that she was in the hospital, which is totally abnormal for her.  The doctor appeared very unconcerned and says well will find out what is wrong and get her back to normal in no time, and then pranced out.

After several vials of blood were taken and 500 mL of fluids given, and urine obtain from a bedpan, we waited. She did get a chest X-ray and a head CT for some reason.

Now my mother has atrial fibrillation, but refuses to see a cardiologist, and she has stage III chronic kidney disease, which is normal for someone 99 years old, and she did make plans to see a nephrologist.  Her heart is weak because she so inactive, due to the pain in her legs which was recently compounded by the  current urinary infection, as well as her sleepiness, but we did not know there was a urinary infection until that same Friday morning.

Dr. Jones came in again, smiling and jovially saying that she appears to be fine, and is she “acting normal” now?  He intimated that they were going to release her.  I strongly objected, stating my mother is not normal.  She was confused as to where she was.  She did not know what time it was.  She kept sleeping the entire time she was in the bed except when attended to by a nurse or a doctor, which is highly abnormal for her, as usually she is quite alert and talkative. And, she appeared quite confused by all the wires and tubes connected to her, asking “What is this?” time after time.

A bit thereafter a nurse came in with orders to see if my mother was mobile enough to go home, as Dr. Jones had earlier stated that in her condition would probably be dangerous for her to go home with only a caretaker for eight hours.

Well, the “mobility test” consisted of walking from her ER bed to the ER room entrance which was about 7 feet, and then walking back again.  It took my mother all of four to five minutes to walk 14 feet with a nurse holding her, and using a walker. Yet they were determined to release her.

I told the nurse how can they possibly release my mother in her condition, she is not normal.  She is confused, she cannot walk more than 14 feet with somebody helping her and with a walker, she could never make it to 50 feet to bed from her living room chair where she spends most of the day.  I emphasized that this was an entirely new condition, that until a week ago she had not had that much of a problem ambulating, eating, concentrating, reading and doing crossword puzzles. This was not her chronic condition, but was an acute disorientation.

The nurse said he would convey this information to the doctor.  The doctor never came in, instead a social worker came in, and was quite rude. Jones was too timid to face a critical and upset relative so he sent a surrogate.

She said, “Your mother should never have been brought to this emergency room.  There is nothing acutely wrong with her to be treated.”  She went on to say, “What you should do is either put her on full hospice care, or get her the medical care she requires.  You have to decide when you will let her just be comfortable (until she dies), or to get full treatment; it is one or the other, not both.”  Yet Dr. Jones refused to treat, except for the urinary infection they found, and released. Why didn’t they hospitalize her until her alertness and ability to walk come back by treating her infection in-house, and getting a cardiologist consult for her heart?  Her sudden deterioration was unexplained, and not even noted by them.  They ignored my pleas to treat, and that she was far from normal.

Her regular visiting nurse practitioner from PopHealth, is the one who stated that she should be taken to the emergency room based on her observation of my mother and the results of two very abnormal blood tests that indicated possible blood clots and congestive heart failure.  It was not a decision my mother made, nor that I made.  That social worker repeated that my options were to make her comfortable until she died, or give her the care she needs, but she cannot have both.  And she is being discharged now.  She asked whether I could stay with my mom, to which I responded that I was having hip replacement surgery in three days and was getting prepared to go. 

She responded with a very stern voice, “Well, the doctor said she is going to be discharged even if it is to her home with a caretaker there eight hours a day. I think this is medical malpractice on Dr. Jones’ part as well as Banner Boswell. I assume this is their normal protocol with very elderly patients.

They absolutely refused to admit my mother and treat her for any of the conditions that she was suffering from.  My mother has a nurse practitioner that comes to her home every three months and more often if needed, such as when she came out to draw my mother’s blood and ascertained that my mother really needed more extensive evaluation. She also has another nurse coming two times per week to check vitals and prepare medications.

I talked to another ER nurse about my mother’s condition stating my mother should not be released.  She told me that things have changed since Boswell Hospital was taken over by Banner.  She said that since Obamacare came in full effect and Banner came in, they hardly admitted people anymore from the ER, and that the new attitude was get them in quick and get them out quick.  She said in the old days they wanted to admit everyone, but now under Obamacare and at Banner the elderly get the short end of the stick as a result of sucking 800 billion dollars out of Medicare to pay for it. Can you imagine the state of healthcare if another $880 billion is sucked out of Medicaid?


Kerima, my significant other, has worked in retirement homes for 15 years here and in L.A., and the same is happening there.  Even nonprofit homes have completely changed to a bottom-line, for-profit mentality.  The old CEOs are fired, and new “cut out everything” CEO’s take their place with massive firings of older employees making a good salary, to be replaced by little or poorly trained, much younger employees making half as much, skimping on food quality, reducing activities, and failing state audit after audit. Her previous employer, Glencroft, slipped from 5 stars to barely more than 3 after a new CEO initiated massive firings of older and experienced employees.

I did a quick Google search for reviews of Banner Boswell, and found many negative reviews of that hospital’s ER.

https://www.yelp.com/biz/banner-boswell-medical-center-sun-city

https://www.yelp.com/biz/banner-boswell-memorial-hospital-sun-city

The nine or 10 user comments that yelp does not use to determine rankings, as they are mostly negative, and yelp tends to hide those.  There is a link to these comments at the end of the reviews that they do count.

This is not going to end well for Boswell, as after I return from surgery and recover a little, I am going to get to the bottom of this elder abuse at Boswell Banner. I am assuming this is a systemic problem not isolated to that ER.

Edward Muzika, Ph.D.
Medical Editor

Home: 623 444 5211

Cell: 818 421-3780

Blog: http://itisnotreal.blogspot.com

People who are able to fall in love easily should follow a Bhaktic path with a Guru, or better a Tantric path of utilizing emotions and desires to find their higher or divine self. Those who don’t want or can’t do close relationships are automatically relegated to the dryer yogas like Advaita, or Zen in order to explore emptiness and nothingness. If you are able to choose, choose the Bhaktic or Tantric path first because it will destroy the ego and make the second half of one’s spiritual path, the disappearance of the divine, much easier. With desires fulfilled and then dropped away, one becomes one-pointed during the rest of his or her sadhana.

I am very honest with you; more honest than most teachers who have adopted a holiness role, rather than being genuine with you.  If I talk about sex and desire, it is not because I am a pervert, but because both can be used to realize the divine within one’s self, as did Ramakrishna and many others.  I also do it because there is such a strong current of body and sense denial in all of spirituality, from ancient to present times.  If I talk about emptiness or nothingness, it is to prepare you and to aid you in knowing which path you want to take and where you are on it.

So many teachers are so secretive about everything, either out of fear of being exposed, or because they are mostly empty with nothing to say.  In comparison, I am a blabbermouth because I feel there is value in straight talk, warning and cajoling, even if students run from this because I don’t hide spirituality in intellectualism, or guru modeling, but by relating my own experiences and the specific understandings they generated in me.

I can hardly tolerate teachers who are not authentic, hide their pasts, or hide their true understanding.  Openness, to me, is the true key to spirituality, not concentration, not meditation, not Mantra, not reading Ramana’s talks, or Nisargadatta.  But openness is so hard to find both in teachers and students, the willingness to tell the truth about one’s own self in relation to other teachers and with students.  It is not always possible to be honest with students because so many run away when openness actually occurs. The student always subjects what a teacher says through an analytic filter, trying to find unseen motivations or manipulations, unless they are already open to openness. Real openness is off-putting to many, because it is personal, and many in spirituality are looking to the impersonal or transcendental to escape death.

Yes, self-inquiry is necessary as is meditation, but these practices can close you down as much as open you up when they are done too tightly, and many teachers talk about the need for openness or authenticity, without actually being open or authentic.

Sw. Shankarananda was a scholar and intellectual, but was led almost unerringly to a Tantric guru who stretched him and opened him to love.  I too was an intellectual, but I was led to Zen and Advaita on an entirely different path to enter the depths of the Void.  Then I met Robert who was so distant and withdrawn, that only a Bhakti could love him, and those who did made good progress.

But for me it took a woman to awaken the divine within in an explosion of light, power, and love/bliss, which means Shaktipat can come from any source at any time. A lot of critics cannot accept such a possibly problematic initiation into Shakti.  They are blind to the power of ordinary human love, which when extreme and leads to complete surrender, also can lead to self-realization of the phenomenal self, because in their utter surrender, they see God in the other, that allows them to feel it within their own selves. They can’t get out of their own conceptual boxes of traditional thinking.

So, when a student comes, I ask them what is it they are looking for.  What is it they think they want?  To understand the great problem of life and death?  Are they looking for someone to surrender to for self-realization?  Are they confused, or have they had experiences they want explained?  There are hundreds of reasons for a person to get into spirituality, and I mean a deeper seeking than just reading books or taking workshops, and that reason must be explored within oneself or in an authentic relationship.

The Guru

I speak here about the special relationship between the Guru and the student, and that one is basically lost in the spiritual endeavor without one.  I base this talk on my own experiences as well as those of Swami Shankarananda, whose recent book I repeatedly mention.

I also speak about the radical difference between an energy guru, such as a Kundalini master, versus the teachings and methods of a classical Advaita master such as Ramana Maharshi, Robert Adams, or Nisargadatta.

Yet, really one needs to travel both paths: The first to the opening to the Life Force within, the explosion of divinity and Shakti that gives you the energy and faith to first deepen your relationship to Shakti, to one's own relationship with the divine within; the second is to disidentify first with the body, then with consciousness itself to pass entirely beyond existence, becoming total peace as the last experience.

LINK: https://youtu.be/FvF4E3-dMLY

COMMENT TO ME SENT BY A READER, VIOLET CRYSTAL:

Hello Edward and all. I have a question based on this excerpt from something Robert Adams said in one of his talks:

"We're talking about the ineffable. Something beyond words and thoughts. Something beyond, something beyond. Yet it's so beautiful that there is nothing to say. There is something there when you go beyond consciousness, beyond beingness, beyond pure awareness but yet it's not something at all. For when you think of something you're thinking of a thing. A thing that you can think about. 

"Something that you can feel perhaps.Something that you can identify with. It is beyond all that. There can be absolutely nothing that can be said about it. You can't even experience it. For to experience it there must not be a you. The you has to be transcended, transmuted. 

"Therefore you can never experience this ineffable. And when the you is gone and no longer is there, there is no longer an experience. For again there has to be a you to experience something. When the you is gone who is to experience anything? The experiencer as been totally transcended and the experience has been totally transcended. You are that!"

Is all this pointing to the state of deep sleep and/or death (which I understand to be the same thing)? Everything Robert is talking about can be said of the state of deep sleep which is something every one of us goes through every night.

ED’S REPLY:

Violet Crystal WHERE DID YOU FIND THIS ROBERT QUOTE? IT IS A PERFECT DESCRIPTION OF THE HIGHEST TEACHINGS!

It is not a state of deep sleep or death, but beyond both, and also beyond the conscious, awake mind.

To know it, you have to catch yourself just awakening out of sleep, or just going into sleep.

At that point you can become aware that you are separate from the awake state and the sleep state, and the dream state.

You only are aware that you have nothing to do with consciousness. This is an understanding reached by the mind which only operates in the awake and dream states, which, of course, disappears both in deep sleep and death.  But combining the experience with the understanding of That which lies beyond consciousness is your truest or deepest identity, is your opening to final enlightenment.

THEN, SOMETIMES YOU'LL GET BROUGHT TO THIS AWARENESS SPONTANEOUSLY.

IT CAN BE LIKE THIS: You will feel very relaxed and in peace. Then is feels like you are falling backwards into yourself, which “feels like” a dark, quiet, and juicy presence within. Slowly you will sink into that nothingness, with awareness of the world, and even awareness of awareness diminishing. Yet each "inch" of falling backwards into that Nothingness is accompanied by ever-increasing peace. Eventually you "return: to complete Nothingness, and nothing is experienced except the complete peace of being complete and self-contained, needing nothing, wanting nothing.

There are other ways to experience this "Absolute Witness" without anything being witnessed, except a sense of complete rest and needing nothing. This is deeper than the causal body state, or even Turiya.

This is the entirely beyond to the other shore, beyond life and death of the Buddhist Heart Sutra. Gute, Gute, Paragute, Parasumgute, Bodhi Svaha!

Going into this state of being beyond, complete, and in divine peace frequently, and understanding this as your deepest self completely, solidly, and stably, is the final enlightenment.  From this place you find complete peace even while living immersed in the world, loving and worshipping the life force as Shakti.

Ramana on the Real

In the post immediately below, I offered an experiential/philosophical definition of the term “not real,” or, “does not exist,” from the point of view of Nisargadatta.

However, there is another explanation of these two terms that is used by the neoAdvaitins, and which comes from Ramana Maharishi.  The best explication of Ramana’s thinking along the lines consciousness, the body, existence and nonexistence comes from reading The Path of Shri Ramana, Part 1, by Shri Sadhu Om, chapter 4, page 58.

I have got to tell you that in ways the thinking of Ramana Maharishi seems to me entirely juvenile not very powerful. 

He defines that which is real as that which is always existence, and always aware for is always in awareness.  By that definition alone, the external world and the body are not real, because they are not always in existence or in awareness.  He says further that which is in existence and awareness only temporarily, is not really real, and it is really illusion or unreal.  For him, only the Self was real.

Thus purely by definition, that which comes and goes in consciousness is not real, but Ramana asserts that consciousness is always aware of itself, and is aware of itself in our sleep because when we wake up in the morning, we know we slept.  That is, when we sleep, we are not aware of the external world, we are not aware of mind, we are not aware of our bodies, and I can say most of us are not aware of ourselves while we sleep.  But Ramana says when we wake up we know we have slept, therefore we have existed even during sleep.

To me this is a very crappy argument and makes no sense.  We can just as easily say we knew that the world existed slept for our body existed when we slept.

This is purely a a definition of real, is that which is always aware are always in awareness, and only such exists.  If it does not meet these two criteria, whatever falls outside, considered as unreal.

The neoAdvaitins just eat up this argument, and they buy his argument that the self is always self-aware, it is just that we, by wrong thinking and wrong understanding, such as believing that the world is existent when we are asleep, or the body exists when we are asleep, have deluded ourselves into false truths.  For Ramana, no body and no world exists at all when we sleep, purely by definition, and the only “real” is the Self.  That is, the neoAdvaitins just hold this understanding as enlightenment, and believe that they are enlightened and they can say that the world is not real the body is not real in the self is real without any experience this truth, or any corroboration of these concepts.

This is so very, very different, from Nisargadatta, who holds that the I am, consciousness does not exist in sleep, and both consciousness and the body, as well as the external world are not real as defined in my earlier post of a 17, based primarily on experiences gained over years through meditation on the nature of the self, from seeing the emptiness within, seeing a pulsating, scintillating nature, and changeable nature of consciousness itself, seeing emptiness penetrating through all objects in consciousness which robs objects within consciousness of its individuality, and understanding that our bodies are objects in consciousness also just like the objects we see in the world, and as such we are the creator of both, both having the reality of mentation, imagination, dream.

So when you run into neoAdvaitins on Facebook and the rantings about trying for the real and everything else is unreal, you know they have been convinced by following the bad logic of Ramana, had not had some sort of real self-realization experience.

However, I am fairly sure Ramana and Nisargadatta shared the same state, it is just that they gave two radically different sets of arguments and explanations of unreal, illusion, etc.

They shared the same method, namely abiding in the one’s self, just quietly being oneself, although Ramana also taught to look for the I-thought and where it arose. Following that method, one always finds emptiness or the Void as the source of the I-thought and of all thoughts.

m

SATSANG SUNDAY MAY 21, 11AM CALIFORNIA TIME.

GI TO:  http://satsangwithedji.weebly.com

Password:    edji

THERE ARE INCREASING TECHNICAL PROBLEMS WITH WEEBLY. YOU MAY NOT BE ABLE TSANGTO FULLY ENTER THE CHAT ROOM WITH A USERNAME, AND MAY JUST BE RELEGATED TO BEING A PASSIVE OBSERVER.  IF I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM GETTING IN, NATURALLY THERE WILL BE NO SATSANG, SO JUST SIT IN SILENCE IN YOURSELF.




















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From Dust to Ashes

What is meant when Ramana or Robert Adams says “the world is not real.  You are not real.  You do not exist.  The world is in appearance, an illusion”?

Several things are meant, and all of them are based on experience rather than a philosophical viewpoint.  That is, yogic experience, not every-day, “common sense” notions of concepts.

  

1.  The first “reason” appears at first to be philosophical, but actually rests on experience.  This reason is that nothing lasts, everything is constantly changing, from the mind, one’s body, the seasons, weather, climate, and even the rising of mountains and their subsequent erosion away.  No object lasts.  No object endures.  Nothing is self-sustaining in the objective world of objects.  Seeing under the aspect of eternity, nothing lasts, nothing persists, not even the world for the universe.  As such it is not real in the sense of being self-sustaining, self caused, and eternal.

 2.  In the moment of first awakening, when one first realizes the Manifest or divine Self, the life force, Shakti, acting in conjunction with consciousness, and one loses primary identification of the body, and re-identifies as consciousness, the way consciousness is perceived changes radically.  Consciousness becomes one’s primary identification, and everything is realized as being just an appearance within consciousness, an object within the field of consciousness, and as such, is not independent of your consciousness.  Nothing is independent of you as consciousness.  It does not have an independent existence.  It is just an appearance in consciousness, including the appearance of your own body.  Everything is just in appearance in consciousness.  The operative word is “appearance.”

3. The other thing you have to realize, is that this point your experience of consciousness itself changes as opposed to before when you felt you were dealing with objects that had the same reality as you, as a physical body.  One experiences the world differently.  It is a safe place now as it is no different than you are as body/mind.  Both are appearances within the one consciousness.   Also, consciousness seems far more intimate than a supposedly separate and objective world of coequal objects. They become “your” objects.  And reality no longer seems as solid.  It flows.  Nothing appears solid anymore because everything is permeated against a background of emptiness, and things flow out of emptiness and back into emptiness. It is not just a concept, you actually witness the coequality of form and emptiness and their indivisible interplay.

4.  But after a while of dwelling in and identifying with consciousness instead of with the body, one realizes that consciousness itself is temporary, ever-changing, and is not self-sustaining.  So, just like when a dream ends, the dream world disappears into the unconscious, into nothingness, so when the body dies, the sense field and the sentience associated with that physical body just disappears, and is absorbed into the nothingness which proceeded its birth.  Consciousness comes out of nothingness, and at the end of one’s life span, is recalled into nothingness.  It is a temporary show.  Thus, while everything is consciousness, is known through and by consciousness, and is an appearance in consciousness, consciousness itself is just an appearance within nothingness.

Thus, understand Robert and Nisargadatta when they say world is not real, it is an optical illusion, it is Maya, means that the entire “play” of consciousness has the same reality as a dream, same origin, and the same end.  It suddenly appears from out of nothingness, just as a body is born and sometimes later consciousness begins.  When the body dies, the associated consciousness is absorbed back into nothingness, which some call the absolute.

  

It cannot be understood from the Western point of view where all objects are considered to be independent of consciousness and consciousness merely illumines the existence of relatively stable external objects that exist independently consciousness, and you are but one object among many, some of which are sentient, and others, like rocks appear to not be conscious.  As long as you identify your body as you, and consciousness as the instrument for perceiving a real external world, you can never understand the point of view that no object is real, including your body, or your mind, or your emotions.  All these are constantly flowing, mixing, combining and recombining, flowing out of emptiness and then disappearing back into emptiness or nothingness. 

  

Therefore, Buddhists say form is emptiness and emptiness is form.  Forms have the essential quality of being empty, nothing, and in that sense they do not exist.  They appear out of emptiness, or nothingness, in the same way as the entire universe is supposed to have been born, out of nothingness, in a big bang 13 billion years ago, and they returned to emptiness or nothingness at the end of the universe when all the particles in the universe become dispersed into nothingness.

Practicing Self-Inquiry

Recently two people wrote to me regarding what they considered a problem: the distraction caused by random thoughts.  They wanted to know how to overcome the distraction of their constantly thinking mind.  They wanted to be able to focus their attention laser-like, onto some specific object, like the I-thought, in order to perfoem what they thought was proper self-inquiry.

However, this is entirely the wrong approach.  This forceful control of the mind will beget only tension. which someday may result in a very focused mind, but that focused mind, that laser -like attention, will never discover the self, because the self appears when the mind is entirely gone and is utterly relaxed, because you are utterly relaxed.  A laser-like attention focuses downwards to a point, while relaxed openness, is aware of everything, and is happiness, freedom, and lack of constraint.

Focusing clamps down while relaxation opens up, is not tight, and is not a limiting of awareness.

Instead of trying to use the mind control the mind, you have to do the exact opposite, which is to use the mind to lose the mind, to intentionally relax.  You learn how to relax and drop your attention out of your head and into your heart, and even lower, into the gut.  You need to sit or lie relaxed, and continually relax even more. In such a relaxed state, you can perform complete body scans of feeling each part of your body, starting at you toes and ending in your head. You “feel” your body from toes to head.  Feel into your chest.  Feel your diaphragm move.  Feel the air expanding your lungs.  Feel into your gut.  Relocate your center of gravity of attention from head into your body while in a relaxed state.

Then you relax and open your awareness again to the totality of your consciousness, from inside the body, to the surrounding room and environmental sounds.

And when you sit in formal sitting meditation, let your attention drop into your gut.  Not trying to see anything or feel anything just rest your attention into your gut or heart.

After a bit of practice, you will notice that your brain starts freezing up, and it feels like a rock, heavy, and unable to move or think.  You feel utterly stupid with no thoughts.  After practicing this for a while and getting used to that feeling of being a rock head and utterly stupid, and accepting it as a normal state, one day, suddenly, the center of your attention will drop into your body and out of your head.

The problem of "you" feeling the disturbance of random thoughts, is that your center of attention is in your head most of the time, which is right next to the central transmitter of constant thoughts, namely your brain.  When you both occupy such a small area, the broadcasting thoughts seem like a big deal.  But when your attention falls into your body in a relaxed state, you will enter an entirely new world.  It will feel as if you have dropped into a huge, dark, canyon, an expensive emptiness that will feel entirely open and comfortable.  This is your entry into emptiness, into the Void.  From this new location in that expansive emptiness, the mind will seem so very far away from "you."  What is “you” will now feel like you are in a new location in a vast emptiness, and the mind can continue to prattle and talk to itself but it does not disturb you because the transmitter is no longer located right next to you in your head space.  Thoughts are then experienced like listening to a radio from two rooms away.

Then thoughts do not disturb you.  You can ignore them like all the people in a crowded room while you are attending to one particular conversation, or like ignoring the crowds and sounds while at the beach, lying in the shade.

This is not really enlightenment, but it is an opening into the expansiveness of your heart, and within this expansiveness you can feel your own sense of presence, your own sense of I, of being alive, of being sentient.  Just resting there in your own presence is proper self-inquiry, which is really an abiding or resting in one's own self.  Abiding in the self this way, feeling the quiet emptiness, feeling your sense of presence, feeling the I-energy, will lead to an experience of an identification with the totality of the manifest consciousness, what I call the Manifest Self.

This is the first stage of enlightenment: recognition of yourself as no longer an individual, but identified with the totality of your consciousness, that your consciousness is you, and not that body object which is experienced within your consciousness.  You are much larger than your body experience.  You are the totality of all of your experience including the external world, all your thinking, the emptiness, the peacefulness of that emptiness, and all the energy states that comprise your sense of presence or existence as a sentient being.Recently several people have written to me for advice on how to focus their attention on the I