Self
inquiry the beginners way versus a far more advanced method.
Self-inquiry, the beginners way, is the way both Ramana and Robert Adams
taught, which is to ask the question “who am I?” And silently wait for an answer. Or, if your mind gets distracted by thoughts
or anything else, the method requires that you ask who is it that got
distracted, or better, who is it that is witnessing these thoughts?
This method turns your attention, your awareness, away from things in the
external world, and even away from things in your “external” mind, and focuses
it deeper toward your subjective witness, towards the watcher, feeler, and
listener, and takes you ever backwards into emptiness.
However, it is quite easy to get lost in that emptiness, into that empty
space of internal lighted consciousness, and dwell there for long periods of
time, into that blank emptiness.
Therefore, in the past I have urged people to instead of looking for who
I am inside, to instead “feel” inside for your own source, the ultimate
witness. But by feeling, something very
different happens than by looking. By
feeling, by being carefully attentive towards the “human” essence within, one's
“felt sense of being,, one begins to feel internal energies, which if pursued,
develops into a sense of presence. By
sense of presence, I mean within yourself you find your energy body, your
energy being, prana, Shakti within you, within and around your body. And at some point this explodes within you as
something miraculous, stupendous, totally remarkable, and seemingly as the
divine within you, as God. One might call
this the felt sense of your being as opposed to the witness, this Atman, the
incarnated, localized, God within you and it each of us.
I was very surprised yesterday while reading I am that by Nisargadatta Maharaj,
page 254 the following incredible speaking:
Maharaj: Coming back to the idea of having been born. You are stuck with what your parents told
you: all about conception, pregnancy and birth, infant, child, youngster, teenager,
and so on. Now, divest yourself of the
idea that you are the body with the help of the contrary idea that you are not
the body. This too is also an idea, no
doubt; treat it like something to be abandoned when it’s work is done. The idea that I am not the body gives reality
to the body, when in fact, there is no such thing as a body; it is but a state
of mind. You can have as many bodies and
as diverse as you like; just remember steadily what you want and reject the
incompatible’s.
If you have a body, you must have a soul.
But here now, through all of your bodies and souls shines awareness, the
pure light of chit. Hold onto it
unswervingly. Without awareness, the
body would not last a second. There is in the body a current of energy,
affection and intelligence, which guides, maintains and energizes the
body. Discover that current and stay
with it.
(Comment: is this not what Robert
Adams called “the power that knows the way?”)
Of course, all these are manners of speaking. Words are as much a barrier, as a
bridge. Find that spark of life that
weaves the tissues of your body and be with it.
It is the only reality the body hats.
Q: what happens to that spark of life after death?
Maharaj: it is beyond time. Birth
and death are but points in time. Life
weaves eternally its many webs. The
weaving is in time, but life itself is timeless. Whatever name and shape you give to its
expressions, it is like the ocean—never changing, ever changing.
(Comment: this is similar an idea
that he expresses later frequently in the books edited by Robert Powell about
Maharaj’s talks. In these books, he
refers to that unchanging/changing ocean of consciousness, of sentient-life, as
the universal consciousness, of which every individual sentient being is a
part, participates in universal consciousness.)
Q: what you say sounds beautifully convincing, yet my feeling of being
just a person in a world strange and alien, often amicable and dangerous, does
not cease. Being a person, limited in
space and time, how can I possibly realize myself as the opposite; a
depersonalized, universalized awareness of nothing in particular?
Maharaj: you assert yourself to be what you are not and deny yourself to
be what you are. You omit the elements
of pure cognition, of awareness free from all personal distortions. Unless you admit to the reality of chit, you
will never know yourself.
Q: what am I to do? I do not see
myself as you see me. Maybe you are
right and I am wrong, but how can I cease to be what I feel I am?
Maharaj: a prince who believes himself to be a beggar can be convinced
conclusively in one way only: he must behave as a prince and see what
happens. Behave as if what I say is true
and judge by what actually happens. All I ask is the little faith needed for
making the first step. With experience
will come confidence that you will not need me anymore. I know what you are and I am telling you. Trust me for a while.
The body and mind are only symptoms of ignorance, of
misapprehension. Behave as if you were
pure awareness, bodiless and mindless, spaceless and timeless, beyond where and
when and how. Dwell on, think of it,
learn to accept its reality. Do not
oppose it and deny it all the time. Keep
an open mind at least. Make your mind
and body express the real which is all and beyond all. By doing that you will succeed, not by
arguing.
Very helpful! Thanks Edji
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