What if there were no path? What if there were so many paths and none of them led to a “final” state or ultimate understanding? What if thousands of lost souls had not followed Buddha seeking an end to suffering? What if Buddha at 25 had seen death, disease, starvation in the world, and instead of seeking a way to end the anxiety in himself caused by such scenes, he sought instead ways to alleviate starvation, disease, and suffering in the world by direct action?
You see, all wisdom schools, all paths, all spiritual experiences already exist in you in a nascent state just waiting to be experienced depending on how you direct you attention. Kundalini resides in you whether you are aware or not. Emptiness, the Void, resides in all of your experiences whether you are aware or not. Great love resides in you whether you are aware of it or not. Peace resides in you whether you are aware of it or not. Each has its roots in you waiting the be sprouted by attention.
You can deliberately seek to awaken your Kundalini. You can deliberately seek love, or to be aware of the love in you. You can meditate on emptiness or sit in Shikantaza to become aware of states of being aware of awareness itself, the Void, the container of all experience. You can walk down all these paths of energy, love, meditation, chanting, Shaktipat, Voidness, healing, crystals, koans, pranayama, or….. You can just be aware of your own self in the world in a balanced inner-outer awareness welcoming whatever arises.
Instead of a directed awareness aimed at awakening in you an awareness of experiences others have said they have had by practicing certain pranayamas, chakra meditations, mudras, herb ingestion, yoga poses, emptiness meditations, worship the guru, Christ, or God, what about just be completely open to everything occurring within you and without you?
If the desire to find ultimate states arises within you (the Absolute, Parabrahman), instead of seeking such through reading Nisargadatta, Ramana, or Robert Adams, and then practicing self-inquiry, what if instead, we open to that within us that is propelling us to seek the Absolute? What if we can be open to that which propels us to seek? What is that within us that drives us to seek a Kundalini awakening, to seek the Absolute, to seek love, to seek God, to seek Turiya, or emptiness?
What is that within you that drives you to seek, which prevents you from just being in yourself as you are in the world? What is its form? How does that feeling actually feel like? Feel it! Own it! Be it! Bring whatever it is entirely into your sense of self.
What is it that drives you and makes you seek something you think you want but which you have not yet experienced? What drives you down one spiritual path after another, from one teacher to another? What makes you a seeker? What drives your seeking?
Buddha did not question his own seeking, and he went down one path after another to extreme degree before he found his solution, which was to end desire. Nisargadatta followed his teacher’s words, looked within, found his sense of I Am, an attended to it until he experienced both the manifest and unmanifest selves. He did not question his path.
J. Krishnamurti, so far as I know, is the only famous teacher that asks you to explore that which makes you seek, but really offered no way, no path, to explore one’s own self.
You do not find your inner world merely by looking within, because looking implies separation, a witness and an object. It separates.
Instead, feel within, be aware of all tactile and emotional sensations within your body. Accept those sensations. Feel them, absorb them. Feel the impetus to seek. What is it for you?
As an aid, read Eugene Gendlin’s book entitled ‘Focusing’.