tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27560333.post2486706677180430799..comments2023-12-16T16:12:08.051-08:00Comments on Self-Knowledge and Self-Realization: Ed Muzikahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13214241089861837159noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27560333.post-10180635745102119602012-07-01T22:42:18.493-07:002012-07-01T22:42:18.493-07:00Yes, you are right. It was an unkind email; full o...Yes, you are right. It was an unkind email; full of a lot of smart-ass, bull-shit. The questions you raise, sound like what Ed might say. Regardless of who wrote this, it left me feeling what an ugly thing pride is...and that it is a bigger issue for me than I had realized. Thank you for making it so obvious. I did see her vulnerability and yet wrote that reply anyway. At this moment I'm aware of where the mean-ness came from. It had everything to do with me and nothing with M. If M happens to read these replies, I sincerely apologize for my hurtful remarks.<br /><br />VictoriaAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05717134301159047782noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27560333.post-56531315005424797232012-06-30T14:05:45.693-07:002012-06-30T14:05:45.693-07:00What an unfriendly email. "Rolling on the flo...What an unfriendly email. "Rolling on the floor", "oxygen-deprived from laughing", the mind still has enough oxygen for much speculation. But not enough for logic: "My guess would be that she used the cones in her work then, as she seemed very familiar and at ease with them as visual tools." No other possibility? "I could not shake the feeling that ..." After years of interest in spirituality, still believing this has more to do with M. than yourself? "I am definitely being "critical" of her intentions" - which you surely know, and better than M. "It is telling that she, apparently, has not responded to Ed's last reply to her." Really? Telling in which way? Is she ill? Doesn't she feel like responding? Does she wait for the answer to come? Did she answer, but privately to Ed? Or to the students asking for support? Just wondering. "It seems it may have just been a very fiery and intense Glimpse". Seems it may. So guys out there - if you want to know about your would-be-awakening, ask Victoria Keeling. I am not sure what "shit-mining" in the last paragraph means. Is writing that email an example of such an activity?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27560333.post-50807353501656644772012-06-27T14:18:28.453-07:002012-06-27T14:18:28.453-07:00SO...WHERE'S MARGOT...???
M got a lot of us ...SO...WHERE'S MARGOT...??? <br /><br />M got a lot of us pretty stirred up with that first email to Ed; put us all in our places, she did. Someone later mentioned seeing a video of M on nevernothere.com. I checked it out last week and, sure enough, there were numerous videos; watched about 45 min of one of them, though M's combination of nervousness and "talking down" to the audience made the viewing about as comfortable as a visit to the dentist. <br /><br />She used paper cones made of colored construction paper as visual tools to describe the deconstruction of the ego. That severely damaged her credibility for me. However, when I stopped rolling on the floor, I was then even more curious to see how THIS was the same woman who had given us all such a good Kali-slap... <br /><br />The successful business M had was psychotherapy related, concurrent also with her own spiritual seeking. My guess would be that she used the cones in her work then, as she seemed very familiar and at ease with them as visual tools. Some of what she had to say about personality structure was interesting...though my brain might still have been oxygen-deprived from laughing. Anyone who has had any contact with 'someone' who has awakened is well aware that the basic functional personality is just what it is. [Love you, Ed.] <br /><br />BUT WOW! The difference between those emails and the woman in person was shocking; she did not have any of the confidence or fiery-ness contained in what we read. In her emails it also seemed she was still in the midst of it all and living penniless in Guatemala...but that was years ago in fact. I could not shake the feeling that she was just using that story as a big hook into the "white-middle-class-guilt" of the folks in the conference audience, much as it first grabbed us I suspect. Kinda creepy.<br /><br />Anyway, she's been speaking about her "event" for several years now, so monies for air fare and such are coming from...? Is she living back in the US?...don't know, but there is certainly a questionable intent in her presentation here. She really milked the trauma surrounding the crisis she went through. [Pretty obvious from having milked my own "traumas"...sigh.] Regardless, I find it impossible to see/or feel her experience as a full Awakening. It seems to me that she is just trying to get back into a similar profession as what she had before...only with an even more ego-gratifying twist. <br /><br />I am definitely being "critical" of her intentions; not of her experience of long-term homelessness, nor of the depth of her trauma, or that it shattered her old perceptions...if not completely. However, I felt no sense of presence at all while watching the video; there is a definite vulnerability and/or anxiousness there...very much so...but a not so subtle disconnect as well. <br /><br />It is telling that she, apparently, has not responded to Ed's last reply to her. I would have been very interested to hear about her present internal state and something of her day-to-day ordinary circumstances. Without hearing about her life NOW, it seems it may have just been a very fiery and intense Glimpse into the machine of the "Matrix"...but not a final release from it. <br /><br />For me personally, even after so many years of shit-mining the illusion of separate self, it is still a reality-shock to see that the subtleties of mind-made delusion are nearly infinite. The only thing 100% trust-able is the Silence; resting in the I Am until there is no-thing left.<br /><br />Thanks again to Ed for posting the emails.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05717134301159047782noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27560333.post-51497469016442486182012-06-23T14:53:36.966-07:002012-06-23T14:53:36.966-07:00A sneaky last post, the reason for so many separat...A sneaky last post, the reason for so many separate posts is that my internet and electricity have been cut off....am posting from my mobile as I find places to charge it. Things will sort themselves out in a day or two n I'll b up n running again. Mike lAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27560333.post-24289069786339488002012-06-23T02:05:55.608-07:002012-06-23T02:05:55.608-07:00The obvious and very large elephant in the room of...The obvious and very large elephant in the room of course is.... if comes to it.... how am I ever going to let this old friend die? MikeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27560333.post-85484404260995994882012-06-23T01:44:40.105-07:002012-06-23T01:44:40.105-07:00Further to my post above....if its published:), I ...Further to my post above....if its published:), I am sure if you ask people who have had near death experiences they would say the same as me....that the unspoken "I am" which was first experienced as a child in its purest form, has been experienced again by sudden onset trauma. If the threat of death is kept high with erratic sudden certainty of elimination followed by reprieve, one can abide in or near the I am for months if not years in some peoples experiences, without them realising what is happening. In my case, the first time I found my sense of being, I recognised it as my state during horrific life threatening incidents. It was my old friend, it is love, hope, warm and safe.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27560333.post-43570741888789095692012-06-23T01:15:47.244-07:002012-06-23T01:15:47.244-07:00I lived 25 years of my life out of the UK, with ag...I lived 25 years of my life out of the UK, with aguaruna in the amazon, beja in the red sea hills, darfur, Mozambique, I've seen death and poverty through war and famine, I've been shot, taken hostage. Never a spiritual thought passed through my mind. On returning here experiences started and over the last years I have practiced self enquiry. The knowledge that everywhere is the same in this vast painting we call life has helped me. The whole structure is constructed from a standard set of elements. The emotions. I guess once your thoughts really don't fire up any/much emotions life ( as we know it. Jim) stabalises and I guess that's a good point from which to self enquire. Or not? MikeAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27560333.post-51958197473427495912012-06-22T11:20:11.759-07:002012-06-22T11:20:11.759-07:00You said, "Enlightenment is just a momentary ...You said, "Enlightenment is just a momentary thing whereby Life is seen through for what it really is. For some reason, all seekers seem to be putting all their chips on this incident."<br /><br />I can admit to hoping there would be such a thing as this...some one time seeing...I've put all my chips into the hopes of this being the case for several years now. I am beginning to see that this is not the case. Now I am facing the deep disappointment of this grandiose illusion.<br /><br />Great point below. <br /><br />... BUT awake living, operating from nothingness, acting freely in the world is what its all about!!! And that's not an affair of the meditation cushion. It's an affair of living daily life. <br /><br />ThanksAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com